2008/Jan-Jun/Announcements/Evolving Item Report

NPC:Dr. Singh

The Evolving Item Report for 2008.

Report Jun/12/'08 marks the start of "What's your favorite current Evolving Item right now?" poll that takes place in the Gaia Community Discussion forum. Reports after that article do not link these polls. Instead a separate article has been created to gather them onto one page.

Notice that Dr. Singh's avatar has replaced Timmy (and other co-hosts) in the announcements since he is no longer present as a character.

January

03 Evolving Item Report: Fausto's Bottle and Hermes' Moon

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy brain

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Fausto's Bottle and Hermes' Moon - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Jan 03, 2008 4:24 pm

Dr. Singh: Good morning, Gaians! Welcome to this week's Evolving Item Report, your first source for all the latest biology news. We've got a quick update for you this week, so let's dive in. Are you ready, Timmy?

Timmy: I was born ready! And then I got even readier, thanks to the miracle of massive genetic tamperin'!

Dr. Singh: I notice that your cranium is looking a bit... tumid.

Timmy: You're darn tootin' it's tumid, doc! And I've never felt better! I can... YEEP! ...feel my scalp burnin' whenever I think about stuff!

Dr. Singh: Well, that shouldn't be too much of a problem for you. Anyway, let's get to the news. This week, two items will be evolving: Hermes' Moon and Fausto's Bottle will both be entering their next phases! If you have one of these items, you can see its new form by visiting the My Avatar screen, removing the item from your avatar and then reequipping it.

Timmy: Swell! Also, Flynn stopped by earlier to give me a message, but she got pretty nervous on account of my big throbbin' noggin! Through all her stammerin' I gathered that there's a new item released today: the January Birthstone Crown, a perfect gift for all those January babies! Also, the Cash Shop is now plum sold out of the following items:

o The OMG Box

o Pora Ice

o Angelic Earmuffs

o Demonic Earmuffs

o Let it Snow

They might be back in the future, or they might not!

Dr. Singh: That's about it for this week's Evolving Item Report. Tune in next week for more news! Say goodbye, Timmy.

Timmy: Bye, everybody! Remember, if you want to hop on the crazy evolving item rollercoaster, you can pick one up in the Gaia Cash Shop.

09 Cash Shop Update: Chess Pieces & Evolving Item Report!

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy brain

• Topic Cash Shop Update: Chess Pieces & Evolving Item Report! - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Wed Jan 09, 2008 9:35 pm

Dr. Singh: Welcome to the Evolving Item Report! We'll have to keep it brief this week, since my little pal Timmy is a bit agitated. What's wrong, Timmy?

Timmy: Golly doc, don't worry about me! I feel fine! It's just that with this big ol' wonderful brain of mine, my thoughts naturally tend to wander toward... YEEP! ...fantasies of violence! You know how it is, right doc?

Dr. Singh: Of course, Timmy! It's nothing to worry about. Would you like to tell our listeners about this week's evolutions?

Timmy: I'll rip 'em to shreds! I mean... YEEP! ...I'd love to tell 'em, doc! This week, the Pantheracorax Agate and the Biancamella are evolving. If you own one of these items and want to try on the new evolution, just visit the My Avatar screen, remove the item from your avatar and then reequip it.

Dr. Singh: Right you are, Timmy. That's it for this week's Evolving Item Report. Say goodnight, little friend!

Timmy: Grraaargh! Remember, if you want to experience an evolving item for yourself, you can pick one up in the Gaia Cash Shop.

18 Cash Shop Update: Towns Chessboard, Masks & Evolving Items

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy horn

• Topic Cash Shop Update: Towns Chessboard, Masks & Evolving Items - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jan 18, 2008 3:05 pm

Dr. Singh: Welcome to the Evolving Item Report! I'm Dr. Singh, Gaia's resident expert on all things biological, and this is my little friend Timmy, who seems to be mutating into something quite horrifying. How's that big ol' head of yours, buddy?

Timmy: It's the greatest, Doc! Nothin' beats a huge.... YEEP... argh...

Dr. Singh: Are you feeling OK, sport?

Timmy: Fit as a fiddle! It's just that this swelling in my forehead has been gettin' a little worse lately, and... YEEP! I keep feelin' that powerful urge to devour everyone around me. You know how it is, right Doc?

Dr. Singh: Absolutely. It's nothing to worry about; you're just growing a slight bony protuberance on the front of your skull. Here, I took the liberty of taking this X-Ray while you were asleep:

Timmy: Holy smackerjacks, is that my brain? I think I see that paperclip I put in my nose last year. Enough about me and my brain-horn, doc, let's tell 'em about the items! I'm excited!

Dr. Singh: Three items have evolved this week. Fausto's Bottle is showing signs that the creature within might not be quite so cute and cuddly as we previously believed. Quite an interesting development. The Hermes Moon has also evolved, with the strange animal fully visible for the first time. If you have one of these items, you can see its new form by visiting the My Avatar screen, removing the item from your avatar and then reequipping it.

Timmy: I thought you said there were three! That's only two, Doc!

Dr. Singh: Oh, yeah. I hoped you wouldn't notice. That filthy little jar of pond-water in the corner is also changing. The Orindae seems to be turning into some sort of disgusting tadpole. While I have the utmost respect for all creatures great and small, I really wish someone would just get that thing out of my sight.

Timmy: Aww, it's not so bad! It's kinda ugly-cute, in a greasy, wriggling way. Just like me!

Dr. Singh: Don't be so hard on yourself, little chum. You'll grow up into a fine young man, and I'm sure you'll make some girl very happy one day.

Timmy: Yeah! By rippin' her nose off and... YEEP... drinkin' her blood! Wow, did I just say that?

Dr. Singh: No, Timmy, you didn't. That's it for this week's evolving item report, ladies and gentlemen! If you'd like to get an evolving item of your own, you can pick one up in the Gaia Cash Shop.

24 Evolving Item Report: Two new evolving items!

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy horn2

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Two new evolving items! - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Jan 24, 2008 3:20 pm

Dr. Singh: Welcome to the Evolving Item Report! I'm Dr. Singh, Gaia's foremost biologist and genetic mutation expert. With me is Timmy, my angry little friend. As you can see, he's been mutating again... how do you feel, little buddy?

Timmy: YEEP! I feel... nrrrgh... JEPPERSgolly...

Dr. Singh: That's great, Timmy. We've got some big news this week: two brand new evolving items in the Cash Shop!

-

Timmy: Waaugh!

Dr. Singh: This week, Flynn has received a shipment of White Drome Eggs. I recently recovered these living fossils from a dig site in Gaia's badlands. For insurance reasons, I can't disclose exactly what's inside these eggs, but please remember this: handle them with extreme caution and never turn your back on them.

Timmy: Hrr... Righty-o, Doc! This egg may look like... YEEP! But... but the biting!

Dr. Singh: You've got that right, friend! Prehistoric eggs are dangerous enough, but do you know what's even more dangerous? Mad science! In a bold and reckless move, Flynn has decided to stock The Experiment in the Cash Shop. This volatile substance may have severe mutative powers, so don't say we didn't warn you!

Timmy: But that's not all, right Doc? We've also got... urrrgh...

Dr. Singh: We sure do. My studies indicate that the Green Corallus Egg, Tama's Basket, the Pantheracorax Agate and DandiiDooDad Spore are all due to evolve this week. If you own one of these items, you can see its new form by visiting the My Avatar screen, removing the item from your avatar and then reequipping it.

Timmy: RRGhhh!! Sounds wonderful, Doc! I can't wait to see what... GOTTA BITE!

Dr. Singh: OUCH! Bad Timmy! No biting! Do you need me to get the whip? ...Er, sorry folks, looks like we'll need to bring this week's report to an end while I disinfect this bite.

Timmy: Sheesh, sorry Doc! That was weird, huh? Remember, you can pick up your own evolving item by visiting the Gaia Cash Shop! YEEP! Oh, and stick around for a little Cash Shop announcement from Flynn.

31 Evolving Item Report: Fausto's, Hermes' & Biancamella

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy horn3

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Fausto's, Hermes' & Biancamella - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Jan 31, 2008 4:04 pm

Dr. Singh: Good day, Gaian friends, and welcome to the Evolving Item Report! I'm Dr. Singh, Gaia's top biologist, zoologist, paleontologist and, on weekends, field hockey midfielder. I'm sure you all know my tragic little mutant co-host, Timmy. How'ya doing, friend?

Timmy: Doc, I've never felt better in my life! Sorry I bit ya last week, but the swelling in my braincase was exertin' pressure on my amygdalae, causing uncontrollable aggression and loss of... YEEP! ...speech functions!

Dr. Singh: Wonderful! So, now that your rhino horn has emerged, your violent thoughts should be calming down!

Timmy: Oh, golly, not at all! I'm angrier and more violent than ever, and I'm lovin' every minute of it. YEEP!

Dr. Singh: That's... great news, Timmy. Let's move on to business. This week, we've got three items moving into their next stages. The Biancamella has evolved into a gorgeous new piece of clothing, and Hermes' Moon is moving into a strange new phase.

Timmy: Hurry up, Doc, I feel like bitin' something.

Dr. Singh: The biggest news this week is that the first generation of Fausto's Bottle is growing ever closer to the end of its evolution cycle, and this week's spectacular transition must be seen to be believed. Even I didn't anticipate this!

Timmy: It's... it's glorious! If you wanna see this new pose for yourself, just visit the My Avatar screen, remove the item from your avatar and then reequip it.

Dr. Singh: That's all for this week, folks! If you'd like to pick up an evolving item for yourself, just stop by the Gaia Cash Shop (move your mouse over the "Market" menu to find it). I'd better get Timmy out of here before he gets all cranky. Aren't you ready for a nap, little guy? You've been pacing in circles and gnashing your teeth for almost 72 hours straight now.

Timmy: Ha! Not on your life, Doc! I never get tired anymore, ever! Better sleep with one eye open, too, cause I'm feelin'... YEEP! ...like I've lost the ability to tell right from wrong, and I no longer see people as anything other than big chunky blood milkshakes! Isn't that funny?

Dr. Singh: Eh... heh heh...

February

07 Cash Shop Update: Eastern Zodiac + Evolving Item Report

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy horn4

• Topic Cash Shop Update: Eastern Zodiac + Evolving Item Report - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Feb 07, 2008 4:53 pm

Dr. Singh: Happy new year, everyone, and welcome to the Evolving Item Report! Once again, I've got my monstrous little companion Timmy here to tell you about this week's biological happenings.

Timmy: GrrrRRReetings, everyone! We've got some great news about your evolving... *GULP* ...ehhh, sorry! I'm still droolin' a little bit about all those tasty animal costumes in Flynn's announcement. I thought humans couldn't possibly look any more delicious than they already did, right Doc?

Dr. Singh: Right you are, Timmy. I mean... wait, what? Let's move on to business. This week, the beautiful Pantheracorax Agate has grown into a mighty griffin! Owners of first-generation Agates are now blessed with a glorious mythical companion to protect them. Lucky break!

Timmy: YEEP! You bet, Doc! And don't forget about the other one!

Dr. Singh: What other one?

Timmy: You know, the Orindae! It's evolving too, right?

Dr. Singh: Ugh, that thing! Yes, the Orindae has grown quite a bit in the last couple of weeks, and it's now showing indications of its form. It appears to be some sort of vile, slimy amphibious creature, gasping with its awful little mouth and struggling to free itself from its jar. Don't touch it, Timmy. You might get warts.

Timmy: Already got 'em! I guess that's about all for this week, right? Right, Doc? Huh? C'mon, I'm hungry! Let's go to the graveyard again an'...

Dr. Singh: Shh!

Timmy: Oh yeah! It's a... YEEP! ...horrible secret, huh! A terrible pact made out of grim necessity, to prevent the abomination you created from preying on the living, huh!

Dr. Singh: You're a loveable little scamp, Timmy. Let's go get you a treat.

Timmy: Bye bye, everyone! Stay tuned for a special Tuesday edition of the Evolving Item Report, coming next week!

12 Cash Shop Update: Valentine's Gifts & Evolving Item Report

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy bite

• Topic Cash Shop Update: Valentine's Gifts & Evolving Item Report - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Tue Feb 12, 2008 3:50 pm

Timmy: Howdy-do, everybody! Welcome to the Evolving Item Report. Say hello to my pal Dr. Singh, Gaia's favorite naturalist and my... YEEP! ...favorite lady!

Dr. Singh: Why thank you, sport. You're being awfully sweet today.

Timmy: Ya know what, Doc? All those violent thoughts that have been swirlin' in my mind like a whirlpool of vicious darkness have really been clearin' up lately. I think I'm ready to... YEEP! ...turn over a new leaf. After all, Valentine's Day is all about bein' nice to each other!

Dr. Singh: You're a fine little gentleman, despite your increasingly grotesque deformities. Would you like to do the honors this week?

Timmy: Gladly! We've got two items evolving this week. First up, the White Drome Egg is finally crackin' a little bit! We're one step closer to figurin' out what kinda critter is hidin' inside. Hermes Moon has also changed again, too! The lil' bunny-thing is bein' even cuddlier nowadays. Exciting, huh?

Dr. Singh: That's big news, Timmy, but I think we've got even bigger news this week...

Timmy: Yup. This is the big one, folks. This is what we've all been waitin' for. The first generation of Fausto's Bottle will finally reach the end of its evolution today! Not only will you get the glorious final surprise, but you'll also be able to use any previous form of the bottle. It's totally unlocked! If you wanna see the new pose for yourself, just visit the My Avatar screen, remove the item from your avatar and then reequip it.

Dr. Singh: This is truly a red-letter day for science! How shall we celebrate, little friend?

Timmy: Well, milady, bein' as how it's nearly Valentine's Day an' all, I was thinking maybe I could offer you a... YEEP! ...polite and respectful kiss on the hand, since you're such a special lady.

Dr. Singh: Such wonderful manners, young man! Why, I'd be honored.

Timmy: GRARRGGHH!

Dr. Singh: OW! Let go! Ouch! Bad Timmy! ...Well, everyone, looks like I have to detatch this little fellow from my hand. See you next week!

Timmy: Mmrrph!

21 Evolving Item Report: New item, plus five evolutions!

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy bite2

• Topic Evolving Item Report: New item, plus five evolutions! - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Feb 21, 2008 3:42 pm

Dr. Singh: Hello, everyone! This is Dr. Singh, Gaia's resident naturalist and evolutionary scholar. Sorry if I seem a little nervous this week... our unusual friend Timmy seems to be in the process of devouring my arm. How ya doing, little buddy? Grunt if you're OK!

Timmy: Rrrrgh!

Dr. Singh: Ouch! Watch the teeth! Much as I would love to call in sick today and try to pry this little monster offa me, we've got a lot of big, big news to report.

-

First up, here's the top story: we have a new evolving item! I've just received word from Flynn in the Cash Shop that she's received a shipment of a mysterious new object called Alruna's Rose. It currently appears to be a gorgeous rose crowned with ethereal purple flame, but there's something strange about it. It evokes a powerful feeling, as if there's some intelligence within it. Flynn told me, in hushed tones, that both male and female customers seem drawn to the rose as if they're enchanted... seduced, even. To be honest, it gives me the creeps... in a good way.

More major news: As you may know, Fausto's Bottle, Gaia's signature evolving item, reached its final state of evolution last week. Next week, Fausto's Bottle will be leaving the Cash Shop. If you're looking to buy this evolutionary masterpiece, please don't delay, or you might miss your chance!

Timmy: Muurrff! Wmph nurbh fuh nur urtums!

Dr. Singh: You're absolutely right, Timmy.

Timmy: Furvh urrtum!

Dr. Singh: Indeed, it's a BIG week for item evolution! Five items have evolved into new forms: the Biancamella has become even lovelier this week, and the Green Corallus Egg is continuing to grow. The Experiment is also showing some signs of growth, although I still have no idea what scientific wonders may yet emerge from the beaker. The DandiiDooDad Spore will definitely make its owners squeal with delight: it's grown into a sweet little sentient plant-being!

Timmy: Arnh dur purhturrhch arrghhah...

Dr. Singh: Yes, little buddy. This week's big evolution news is the completion of the Pantheracorax Agate's growth! Owners of first-generation Agates can now witness the griffin's final form, or transform the item into any of its previous stages. If you own one of these evolving items, you can view its latest form by visiting the My Avatar screen, removing the item from your avatar and then reequiping it. That's all for this week, folks! Join us next week for another edition. Say bye bye now, Timmy.

Timmy: Gurrhh! Suhh yuhh nehh wurrk!

Dr. Singh: Now let me see if I can pry this little... YEEP!

...did I just say 'yeep'? This bodes ill...

28 Cash Shop Update: Orphan Adoption + Evolving Item Report

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy bite3

• Topic Cash Shop Update: Orphan Adoption + Evolving Item Report - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Feb 28, 2008 3:02 pm

Dr. Singh: Hi, everyone! This is Dr. Singh, Gaia's foremost evolution expert. Welcome to the Evolving Item Report! My little buddy Timmy is still trying to devour my arm, so he will be unable to comment on th--

Timmysingh: Jeepers, Doc! I guess I shoulda mentioned that I figured out how to take over your mind and speak directly through your mouth! Isn't that a kick in the pants?

Dr. Singh: YEEP!

Timmysingh: It must have somethin' to do with my mutant drool coursin' through your blood stream, I guess. Anyway, let's get down to business!

Dr. Singh: Ugh... must... fight...

Timmysingh: Looks like we got two items evolvin' today! First of all, the... urrrghhh... quit yer mental strugglin', Doc! We've got a job to do! ...anywhose, Hermes' Moon has evolved again! It's one of the most popular items out there, so I know tons'a people are gonna want to check out the new form. Neato!

Dr. Singh: Neato... indeed...

Timmysingh: That's what I'm sayin! Also, I know the Doc doesn't much care for the ol' Orindae, that slimy little froggie in a jar, but I kinda like it! It's cute! It's evolving again this week, and I'm gonna come right out and say I'm happy about it. I guess the Doc would probably argue with me if I weren't controllin' her mind right now. Right, Doc?

Dr. Singh: Timmy... is... new master...

Timmysingh: Wow, I was thinkin' the same thing exactly. It's like we're of one mind. That's all for this week, folks! If you own one of these items, you can check out its new form by visiting the My Avatar screen, removing the item from your avatar and then reequiping it. Byebye for now, folks! Say bye, Doc!

Dr. Singh: Urrgh...

March

06 Cash Shop Update: St. Patrick's Day + Evolving Item Report

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy bite4

• Topic Cash Shop Update: St. Patrick's Day + Evolving Item Report - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Mar 06, 2008 4:20 pm

Dr. Singh: Hi, everybody! Welcome to the Evolving Item Report. I'm Dr. Singh, Gaia's top biologist. You may have noticed that I've got a small, mutated boy slowly devouring my arm like a snake eating a gopher. It's a long story, but that used to be my young pal Timmy. He's been trying his hardest to take over my mind and make me a slave-drone, but my superior intellect is keeping him at bay. He can still speak through my mouth, though. Show 'em, Timmy.

Timmysingh: Heya, Doc! Sure, you mighta wrestled control of your mind back for now, but you're definitely gonna be my puppet soon. But in the meantime, we've got a job to do!

Dr. Singh: Indeed we do, my villainous little parasite. There are two items evolving this week. Since you've violently implanted yourself in my mind anyway, would you care to start?

Timmysingh: Sure thing, boss! First up, the White Drome Egg has evolved again. I'm readin' the Doc's mind to try to figure out what it's gonna be, but I can't seem to get a clear answer, and... Jeepers, Doc! Choppin' me up with an axe? That's a rude thing to think about, even if I am swallerin' your arm!

Dr. Singh: Sorry, Timmy. Maybe I got a little carried away... Meanwhile, we've also seen signs that our newest and most mysterious item, Alruna's Rose, will be changing for the first time this week. It's too early to tell what this item may one day become, but its strange, seductive energy is growing more powerful every day.

Timmysingh: Yow! I want one!

Dr. Singh: Not now, Timmy. Maybe when you're older. This item may not be suitable for younger owners.

Timmysingh: Welp, I guess that's all the news this week. Now I'd better get back to devoting all my mental energy to taking over the Doc's brain. You ready, Doc? Here it comes!

Dr. Singh: Must.... YEEP! ...serve... Timmmy... nnnNO! Ahem. You'll have to try harder than that, young man. I'm on to your little game.

Timmysingh: Aww, shucks! Well, see ya later, everyone! We'll be back next time with some more horrifyin' mental chess!

13 Cash Shop Update: New Evolving Item!

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy bite5

• Topic Cash Shop Update: New Evolving Item! - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Mar 13, 2008 4:44 pm

Dr. Singh: Howdy, folks! Welcome to my report! My name is Doc, and I'm some kind of fancy science lady who knows a buncha stuff. This handsome lil' fella you see gnawin' on my arm here is Timmy, the unquestioned... YEEP! ...master of all that he surveys!

Timmysingh: Thanks for the kind introduction, Doc! I'm glad ya finally accepted my way of seein' things.

Dr. Singh: Well golly, Timmy! Of course I accept you as my master. You'd have to be... YEEP! ...some kinda big dumb idiot to disagree with someone so smart an' handsome as me... I mean... you. Anyways, let's stop all this talkin' about how great Timmy is and get to the good stuff. This week, we got a brand new evolving item for you guys! It's called the Dionaesil, and it looks to be some kinda... plant thinger.

-

Timmysingh: Yeah... looks like a... some kinda plant.

Dr. Singh: Being a smart science lady, I can tell you that this plant is... uhh... this plant is real special. This is an extra-fancy plant. It's got a... it's got leaves and molecules and... gggrAAARRGH... must... fight...

Timmysingh: Uh oh... looks like the Doc's gettin' feisty...

Dr. Singh: Argh! Damn it, Timmy, I may not be able to keep you from controlling my mind, but I won't have you perverting the name of science with your uninformed gibberish. What we have here is a Dionaesil, an incredible organism from the deep jungle surrounding Gaia's Otami ruins, northwest of Barton. Though plantlike in appearance, its unpredictable growth almost seems to display a kind of primitive intelligence. I don't know where Flynn managed to find these specimens, but I can't wait to further observe their unique propert... urrghh... uhh...

Timmysingh: Whew. She's a tough one. Soooooo anywho, we've also got a couple of items evolvin' this week. The Biancamella, which is definitely one of our prettiest items, has changed again. Hermes' Moon also evolved again this week. I can't wait to see what that little bunny's doin' this time! If you own one of these items, you can check out its new form by visiting the My Avatar screen, removing the item from your avatar and then reequiping it.

Dr. Singh: Well, we're plum outta time this week, folks! Me and my wonderful handsome friend Timmy hafta go now, but we'll see you again real... YEEP! ...soon.

20 Cash Shop Update: Easter Items + Evolving Item Report

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy bite6

• Topic Cash Shop Update: Easter Items + Evolving Item Report - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Mar 20, 2008 4:15 pm

Timmysingh: Hey guys! This is yer pal Timmy, and I'm talkin' through the Doc's face because my mouth is too busy gnawin' on her arm. It looks like I'm makin' some progress, though! Pretty soon, I'm plannin' on integrating myself into the Doc's body, so we'll be one organism! Won't that be swell?

Dr. Singh: To be honest, Timmy, I'm not quite sure I approve... but let's discuss this later. We have work to do.

Timmysingh: Oh yeah, that reminds me! You mighta noticed that I'm not controllin' the Doc's brain this week. After all the business last week where I wasn't doin' a good job tellin' you guys about the items, we made an agreement that she gets to handle the science stuff and I'll only control her brain durin' our leisure time.

Dr. Singh: You're very considerate.

Timmysingh: Thanks! It's the least I can do, since I've been makin' thinks a little inconvenient lately with the whole arm-eatin' business. Anywho, shall we get started?

Dr. Singh: Sure thing, little friend. Three items seem to be evolving this week. Alruna's Rose is starting to develop in an unexpected way; it appears to be taking on an almost animal aspect. Meanwhile, The Experiment is continuing ever further down the slippery slope of reckless science. We can only hope it won't doom us all!

Timmysingh: And what about the third item, doc?

Dr. Singh: Yecch. Much as I loathe to willingly let you talk through my mouth, I think I'm going to let you handle the last one. I just plain don't like it.

Timmysingh: Alrighty, Doc, that's fine with me! OK, guys, I don't know why the Doc is so creeped out by the Orindae, but she doesn't even like lookin' at it. Sure, it maybe slimy and bulbous and warty, but that's no reason to make it feel unwelcome! It's gettin' even bigger and uglier this week, but I think it's sorta cute...

Dr. Singh: Ugh.

Timmysingh: To see these new poses, just visit the My Avatar screen, remove the item from your avatar and then reequip it. That's it for this week, folks! See ya later!

Dr. Singh: Goodbye, everyone! We'll be back soon with more evolving item news.

26 Evolving Item Report: Corallus, White Drome and Hermes Moon

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy bite7

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Corallus, White Drome and Hermes Moon - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Wed Mar 26, 2008 4:21 pm

Timmysingh: Hiya, friends! This is Timmy, Gaia's most famous science guy, and this is my assistant, the Doc. You mighta noticed that I'm currently swallerin' her arm, and soon I'm gonna take over her whole body. Almost done!

Dr. Singh: Now wait a minute, Timmy. Since when am I your assistant?

Timmysingh: Well, Doc, I decided that since I can take over your brain and whatnot, it might be better if I was officially in charge from now on. Don't worry, I'm still gonna let you mostly be free, but--

Dr. Singh: That's outrageous! You're in no position to start bossing me around, you little...

Timmysingh: Don't be a brat about it, Doc, or I'll take over your brain again.

Dr. Singh: Hi, this is the Doc, and I'm a big dumb jerk who talks about science all day, I love molecules and I want to marry them, blah blah blah, atomic weight of rubidium, blah de blah blah.

Timmysingh: See?

Dr. Singh: Arrgh... you insufferable little... we've got to stop this, Timmy. We've got a job to do. These people rely on us for the latest news about evolving items, and we can't let our petty personal struggles get in the way of that.

Timmysingh: OK, I'm glad we agree. Let's get down to business.

Dr. Singh: We've got four items evolving this week. First of all, people with first-generation Corallus Eggs are in for a treat: the item has finished evolving, and its amazing final stage is now available.

Timmysingh: Jeepers, Doc! It's amazing!

Dr. Singh: Stop squirming! Your horrible little kitten teeth are irritating my shoulder!

Timmysingh: Sorry, I just got a little worked up. Anywho, the White Drome Egg is also evolving this week! Looks like the little fella is getting' kinda feisty! They're so cute when they're that age...

Dr. Singh: Be careful, Drome Egg owners! Sometimes things look cute and harmless, but they're actually sadistic little creatures who'll take the first opportunity to betray and devour you.

Timmysingh: And how!

Dr. Singh: Meanwhile, the DandiiDooDad Spore is continuing to evolve. Last but not least, the ever-popular Hermes' Moon seems to be growing lovelier by the week!

Timmysingh: Just like us! Right, Doc? Right? We're gonna be the most glorious creature in all of Gaia soon!

Dr. Singh: Yes, Timmy. That sounds wonderful. I can't wait to become a freakish monster with the mind of a child.

Timmysingh: Aww, quit whinin' and fetch me some taffy.

April

04 Evolving Item Report: Alruna's Rose, Dionaesil & Biancamella

[NPC] Dr. Singh, Timmy, and Labtech Gene doc 1a

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Alruna's Rose, Dionaesil & Biancamella - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Apr 04, 2008 3:16 pm

Dr. Singh: Hi, everyone! Welcome to the Evolving Item Report. I'm Dr. Singh, Gaia's resident naturalist, and this little creature melding into my arm is Timmy. If you're wondering about this fellow standing behind me, we'll address that a little later. First, we've got to get down to business.

Timmysingh: Oh boy, Doc! We've got some crazy stuff goin' on today! Three evolutions, including one thing reachin' its final stage!

Dr. Singh: Indeed, my dear boy. Alruna's Rose has grown once again, and we can now see that it's developing into a fully-formed creature. My studies indicate that this is just the beginning, however, and it's still got some major surprises in store. Over the coming months, it will continue to develop into something truly astounding.

Timmysingh: What'll it be, Doc!? What'llitbewhat'llitbewhat'llitbe!!?

Dr. Singh: Be patient, little friend. We'll know soon enough. The Dionaesil appears to be sprouting this week, as well, though it's in the very early stages of its growth.

Timmysingh: Still kinda looks like a plant, Doc.

Dr. Singh: That's because it IS a plant. It takes time to grow, but we can be sure that it'll turn into something very unusual. But the big news this week is the Biancamella, one of the most sought-after evolving items in the world. We're incredibly proud to report that, this week, the sugary confection will reach its final stage of growth. First-generarion Biancamellas will now have every single mode available, plus an incredible amount of new poses. This item has truly exceeded our wildest expectations:

-

Timmysingh: YEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeep!!!

Dr. Singh: You said a mouthful, Timbo. Remember: later generations of the Biancamella will still take some time to reach their final stages. If you own one of these items, you can visit the My Avatar page, remove the item and reequip it to see the new evolutions.

Timmysingh: That's all for this week, folks!

Dr. Singh: But they're probably still wondering about this Labtech standing with us...

Labtech Gene: I can field this one, Dr. Singh. I'm Labtech Gene, one of the few remaining specialists in the field of genetic surgery... as you may know, G-Corp has had a few mishaps in recent years that have claimed the lives of a lot of my colleagues, but I've managed to stick around so far. Dr. Singh wrote me a letter a few weeks ago asking for help with a unique genetic problem, so I've come to help her out with her... Timmy situation.

Timmysingh: I'm not a 'situation'! I'm a human being! Or, I used to be one, I guess...

Labtech Gene: Is it my imagination, Dr. Singh, or has this little mutated child been speaking through your mouth?

Dr. Singh: Yeah, he does that. He can take over my mind, too. That's why I'm trying to get the little fellow off my arm before things get any worse.

Labtech Gene: I'll have to run some tests to get a full understanding of what needs to be done. Perhaps we'll have more information next week. I'd better get to work.

Dr. Singh: See you next week, everyone!

10 Evolving Item Report: New Item - The Enchanted Book!

[NPC] Dr. Singh, Timmy, and Labtech Gene doc 1a

• Topic Evolving Item Report: New Item - The Enchanted Book! - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Apr 10, 2008 9:57 pm

Dr. Singh: Welcome to the Evolving Item Report! I'm Dr. Singh, bringing you all the latest news on Gaia's evolving items. With me is Timmy, my adorable little mutant sidekick, who's currently devouring my arm and attempting to take over my mind. We've also got a special guest: we're once again joined by Labtech Gene, who will attempt to remove Timmy from my arm.

Timmysingh: But first, let's get down to business! What's goin' on with the items this time, Doc?

-

Dr. Singh: I've just received word from Flynn that there's a brand new evolving item in the Gaia Cash Shop! The Enchanted Book looks outwardly normal, but the text inside is strange and illegible and seems to shift as you look at it. It exudes a feminine aura somewhat akin to the beloved Biancamella, but my finely-honed scientific instincts detect what seems to be a magical presence. If I may depart from science and offer my personal opinion, just touching the book fills my heart with a comforting feeling, like when my mother used to tell me stories when I was a child.

Timmysingh: Spare us the misty recollections, Doc! Let's get back to the sciencey stuff!

Dr. Singh: Yes, of course. The creature within the White Drome Egg is continuing to grow at a rather alarming rate... and it's looking a bit angry this week! On a lighter note, the ever-popular Hermes' Moon has grown once again, this time with several lovely new modes to choose from. We'd also like to note that the 5th generation of Fausto's Bottle has now finished evolving! And... well... that's just about it for this week...

Timmysingh: C'mon, Doc, don’t try to hide it. The Orindae is evolving this week, too!

Dr. Singh: Ugh... yes. Although my scientific training lets me emotionally detach from even the most gruesome of biological sights, I still just can't bear to look at this thing, and it's even more horrifying this week. Horrifying and huge!

Timmysingh: I dunno, Doc, I still think it's one of the cutest creatures I ever saw. I kinda want one for a pet!

Dr. Singh: Not as long as you're attached to me, buster. To see the latest evolutions of your items, just visit the My Avatar page, remove the item and reequip it.

That's all the serious business for this week, but if you're curious about this Timmy situation, stick around for a quick conversation with Labtech Gene. So, what's the prognosis, Gene?

Labtech Gene: Well, I've run some tests, and it seems as though Timmy's DNA has undergone some sort of catastrophic restructuring. Strangely enough, the mutations he's undergoing almost seem to display the mad-science fingerprint of G-Corp's discontinued programs. Tell me, Dr. Singh, was the boy exposed to any sort of toxins?

Dr. Singh: It's a long story... you see, Timmy was acting up one day, so I decided that to teach him a lesson...

Timmysingh: She stuck me in a big ol' barrel of toxic waste and I started mutatin'! It was great!

Labtech Gene: HOLY GOODNIGHT! You put a child in a barrel of toxic waste? That's barbaric!

Dr. Singh: Well... err... it's not exactly how it sounds...

Timmysingh: I dunno, Doc, I think it's pretty much just how it sounds.

Labtech Gene: This is immensely disturbing to me both as a scientist and as a human being. I'm guessing the waste reconfigured Timmy's genetic code, causing him to mutate and instilling in him some sort of drive to meld into your consciousness as some sort of mental parasite...

Timmysingh: Nah, I always kinda wanted to do that.

Labtech Gene: Hmm. So, Dr. Singh, what would you have me do about this?

Dr. Singh: Well, it would be sort of nice if you could get Timmy off my arm and out of my brain. If you could reverse his mutation, that would also be very helpful.

Timmysingh: Aww, c'mon, Doc! I thought we were friends! Don't you want me around anymore?

Dr. Singh: Of course we're friends... but I think this friendship is developing past the point where I feel comfortable.

Labtech Gene: Well, I'll do my best to separate this child and repair his genes, but let me assure you that I'm doing this only out of concern for Timmy, and I thoroughly repudiate the practice of sticking children in barrels of toxic waste. You ought to be ashamed of yourself for perverting science in such an abominable fashion, and furthermore--

Timmysingh: Hey! Quit badmouthin' the Doc! She was only foolin' around when she put me in that barrel, and besides, I love bein' a mutant. If you gotta turn me back how I was, fine, but quit draggin' my best friend through the mud.

Labtech Gene: If you say so, kid. Anyway, I'll see what I can do. If this is the work of G-Corp sludge, it should be possible to reverse the process. Hopefully I'll have some results by next week.

Dr. Singh: That's all for now, folks! Tune in next week for another exciting edition of the Evolving Item Report!

17 Evolving Item Report: Alruna's Rose & The Experiment

[NPC] Dr. Singh, Timmy, and Labtech Gene surgery1

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Alruna's Rose & The Experiment - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Apr 17, 2008 8:34 pm

Labtech Gene: Uhh.... hey? As you can see, I'm a little bit busy right now, but Dr. Singh asked me to handle her Evolving Item Report thing this week, since she's a little bit... anesthetized. I'm about to perform surgery to try to separate her from Timmy and reverse the little fella's mutations, which should be a pretty simple process.

Yeah... I'm not really much of a host, so I'm not sure what she wants me to do, but she did prepare this letter for me to show you guys... so I guess I'll do that. Here it is:

---

Dr. Singh:

“To whom it may concern,

If you're reading this note, I did not survive the surgery. Don't blame Gene; he tried his best, and my death was most likely not his fault. Please consider this note my last will and testament. If Timmy has survived, I hereby bequeath to him my collection of BrainSmart brand Beginning Biology Flash Cards, from which I learned all that I know of science and the natural world. I hope that they will serve him well.

Though it may shock you to read this, I hereby bequeath all of my other worldly possessions-- and my eternal soul-- to my secret love, ...”

---

Oh, uhh... whoops... we'd better not read that. Sorry, that was the wrong letter. Sheesh. I told her the surgery would be quick, safe and relatively painless, but I guess she got a little spooked by the idea of going under the knife. Anyway, here's the other letter. Please ignore that last one:

---

Dr. Singh

“black”

—Dear Friends,

Hello, folks! Welcome to the Evolving Item Report. Sorry for the bad timing, but this was the only day Gene had to operate, so Timmy and I won't be able to talk to you directly this week.

We've got a small (but cool!) update this week! Alruna's Rose and The Experiment, two items which are still shrouded in mystery, have both evolved again. The Rose is continuing in its batlike form, this time becoming a little more playful and mischievous this week, and the Experiment continues to serve as a grim warning against reckless scientific hubris. Then again, so does Timmy!

In other news, all 5th Generation Pantheracorax Eggs will be evolving this week. To see the latest evolutions of your items, just visit the My Avatar page, remove the item and reequip it.

That's it for this week, folks! With any luck, Timmy and I will be back next week, as good as new!

---

Don't worry, folks, everything should be just fine. Your pals will be back next week. In the meantime, I'm going to start the procedure now, so, y'know, uhh... bye.

Oh wait! One more thing! Flynn wanted to stop by and say something real quick, too. So... yeah.

23 Evolving Item Report: Inari's Bead, Hermes' Moon & Dionaesil

[NPC] Dr. Singh, Timmy, and Labtech Gene surgery 2

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Inari's Bead, Hermes' Moon & Dionaesil - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Wed Apr 23, 2008 6:15 pm

Labtech Gene: Oh! Hi, guys... I guess you must be here for the evolving item thing again, huh? Well, er... as you can see, Dr. Singh and Timmy's surgery is taking a little longer than I thought... right now we're in what's known in medical science as the "loosely sorted pile" phase, wherein I've taken apart the patient and sort of... thrown all the bits into a heap... and pretty soon I'll be sticking them back together again, which is kinda the tricky part.

Don't worry, it looks a little bit worse than it actually is. I've done this dozens of times, often with some degree of success.

Flynn left me some notes about this week's evolving stuff, just in case Timmy and the Doc were still indisposed this week. I guess I can take a little break from all this surgery stuff to give you a quick update. After all, I know a thing or two about science and genetics...

Looks like there's a brand new evolving item in the Cash Shop. Inari's Bead is rather a strange item, unlike anything I've seen before. Maybe Dr. Singh would have a clearer idea of what it is, but to me it seems to have a rather mammalian aspect, but with an edge of something more mysterious... even supernatural.

Oh, wow, this is exciting too: Hermes' Moon will be reaching its final phase today. That means that not only does it have a whole bunch of beautiful new poses, but all of its previous modes are unlocked, too. I've always been a fan of Hermes' Moon... those little bunny fellas kind of remind me of Grunnies, only not so bitey.

The Dionaesil is also evolving this week, too! I'm not much of a botanist, but something tells me this plant is just gonna keep getting bigger and bigger...

Some newer-generation items are also catching up this week: 2nd-generation Biancamellas, 2nd-generation Green Corallus Eggs and 6th-generation Fausto's Bottles are all completing their evolution and reaching their final form.

Flynn also told me to tell you that the Biancamella is leaving the shop! It's only gonna be around till April 30th, so you might consider picking it up while it's still available.

Oh, whoops, looks like the pile is starting to twitch a little bit... I'd better get back to work on this before something bad happens. I'm hoping your pals will be back next time, if I can get this pile sorted out. Have a nice week, everyone!

May

01 Evolving Item Report: Enchanted Book, Alruna's Rose & more

[NPC] Dr. Singh, Timmy, and Labtech Gene chairs1

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Enchanted Book, Alruna's Rose & more - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu May 01, 2008 9:54 pm

Dr. Singh: Hello, everyone! I'm Dr. Singh, Gaia's resident biologist and evolving item expert, and this is my excitable little sidekick, Timmy. It's great to be back! If this is your first evolving item report, I should probably fill you in a little: a while back, Timmy was exposed to some toxic waste and began to mutate. Eventually, he became strange and violent, and attempted to eat my arm and control my brain.

Timmy: I'm better now!

Dr. Singh: Yep! We've been undergoing some intense medical treatment for the past couple of weeks, courtesy of our good friend Labtech Gene. We'll let him give you the full details later, but for now, let's get down to business. You ready, Timmy?

Timmy: You betcha! It's what I was born to do!

Dr. Singh: We have a sizeable update this week, with five different items evolving. One of our newest evolving items, the Enchanted Book, is beginning its transformation. It seems to be growing in power this week, and my best guess is that its magic will bring the indecipherable tales written on its pages into reality. I can't wait to see what it has in store...

Timmy: Me neither! And books with pictures are the best kinda books, too! Right, Doc?

Dr. Singh: Of course. On a more serious note, the White Drome Egg continues to be a cause for concern... the creature inside seems to be reaching full maturity, and it doesn't look terribly domesticated. I certainly hope it's housebroken, at least.

Timmy: I pretty much am, at this point!

Dr. Singh: Congratulations. Oh, you'd better cover your ears for this one, Timmy: Alruna's Rose is continuing to evolve this week. While it diverted into cuter territory recently with its bat form, it's now developing into a flirtatious little nymph and a fairly revealing item of clothing!

Labtech Gene: Forgive me for interrupting, Dr. Singh, but YOW!

Dr. Singh: Some more great news: owners of the DandiiDooDad Spore are in for a treat this week. It's one of our more gradually-changing items, but it's finally reached its final stage! The little spore-creature now sports an adorable dandelion mane, and all previous poses of the item have been unlocked. And as for our last evolution... well... Timmy, you want to handle this one?

Timmy: Sure, Doc! I know you're not comfortable talkin' about this, so lemme do the honors: the Orindae just keeps on growin', and... hey, waitaminute! Where'd it go? It's like it just kinda disappeared in a poof of green stuff...

Dr. Singh: This bodes ill, Timmy. In other news, the sixth generation of the Pantheracorax Agate has now completed its evolution. And that's just about it for this week's report, but we should still let Labtech Gene fill us in on how our surgery went. So, what's the story?

Labtech Gene: I'm pleased to report that everything went pretty well, mostly. As you can see, Timmy's been extracted from your arm and your mind, his mutations have been dramatically reversed, your arm seems to be healing well, and all the toxic chemicals in both of your bodies have been neutralized. For the most part, I'd consider this a pretty big success. Mostly.

Timmy: What's all this "mostly" stuff, science guy? I'm feelin' swell, and the Doc's lookin' just as beautiful as ever.

Dr. Singh: Is there something you haven't told us?

Labtech Gene: Well... hmm. How can I explain this. Uhh, you know how there was some part of Timmy that was causing him to want to eat you, take of your mind, destroy humanity, et cetera?

Timmy: Yep! All gone, right?

Labtech Gene: Yeah, I managed to completely remove that part.

Dr. Singh: Great! So... what's the problem?

Labtech Gene: Well... that part of Timmy... let's call it the evil part... I'm not really sure where it is. I think it... escaped.

Dr. Singh: So you mean to tell me that this part of Timmy was an actual, discrete physical thing, and it's now wandered off somewhere beyond our control?

Timmy: Jeepers!

Labtech Gene: Jeez, look at the time... I guess we'd better wrap this thing up, folks! Uhh... come back next week for more exciting news about evolving items and whatnot...

Dr. Singh: Hey! I'm the host!

09 Evolving Item Report: Inari's Beads

[NPC] Dr. Singh, Timmy, and Labtech Gene

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Inari's Beads - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri May 09, 2008 1:47 pm

Dr. Singh: Hello, everyone! Welcome to the Evolving Item Report. I'm Dr. Singh, and this is my faithful little pal Timmy. Thanks to Labtech Gene, things are finally getting back to normal after our long, strange saga of cannibal mutant mind-control terror.

Timmy: You said it, Doc! Bein' a mutant was fun, but I'm kinda glad things are back how they oughtta be. That rhino horn in my skull was gettin' itchy.

Labtech Gene: I'm glad to see you looking healthy. Dr. Singh, I'm guessing you've finally learned your lesson...

Dr. Singh: Oh, yes. Of course. Well... I mean... what lesson is that, exactly?

Labtech Gene: Are you serious? The lesson about not sticking children in barrels of toxic waste!

Timmy: Jeepers! Get off her case! She said she was sorry. Sheesh. It wasn't all her fault, anyways. After all, I was the one who tried to chew off her arm and take over her brain and whatnot. I'm... y'know... I'm awful sorry about that, Doc.

Dr. Singh: Oh, Timmy, don't be silly. It wasn't entirely your fault, and I'm willing to accept some measure of blame for the situation. And... to whatever extent this was my fault, I suppose I'm sorry as well...

Timmy: Aww, that's OK! Anyway, maybe we should get started on this week's evolving item business stuff.

Dr. Singh: Right you are, Timmy. We've got a rather small update today, with just one evolution. However, it's a special one: our newest items, Inari's Beads, are evolving for the first time! This mystical string of beads seems to have considerable power locked up within it, so I'm very curious to see how this will turn out.

Timmy: Well, Doc? What's it gonna turn into? What's your scientific instinct tellin' ya?

Dr. Singh: Well, as always, I hate to speculate on something that I can't be one hundred percent sure about, but my studies definitely reveal an animal aspect to these beads. I'm fairly sure that there's some life with in them.

Timmy: Golly!

Dr. Singh: Also, some newer generations of past items are completing this week. The seventh generation of Fausto's Bottle and the second generation of Hermes' Moon are both finishing up their evolution, meaning that all the items' forms will be unlocked. That's it for this week's report, but I'd like to once again extend my thanks to Labtech Gene for doing such a spectacular job of treating Timmy's mutations.

Timmy: Yeah, thanks! If it wasn't for you, I'd still be gnawin' on the Doc's arm, or worse! I can still taste her ligaments a little bit...

Labtech Gene: It was my pleasure. I really must be getting back to G-Corp now, but before I go... uhh... please remember that your ordeal may not be quite finished yet... there's still that evil piece of Timmy scurrying around somewhere...

Timmy: Aww, nuts to that! If I see that little critter, I'm gonna stomp on it! What's it look like, anyhow?

Labtech Gene: It's... difficult to describe. It pretty much looks exactly like what you'd picture evil looking like. But smaller.

Dr. Singh: We'll keep an eye out for that. I've certainly handled my fair share of dangerous wildlife over the years, so it shouldn't be too hard to get it under control.

Labtech Gene: Yeah... if you say so, Dr. Singh...

Dr. Singh: See you next week, everyone! Remember to stick around for a quick word from our friend Flynn!

15 Evolving Item Report: Alruna's Rose, Experiment & Dionaesil

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Alruna's Rose, Experiment & Dionaesil - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu May 15, 2008 8:47 pm

Dr. Singh: Hello, Gaians! Now that we're done with all the dancing and festivity, let's unwind with a nice Evolving Item Report. I'm Dr. Singh, Gaia's resident naturalist, and this is my adorable sidekick, Timmy. You might notice that our friend Labtech Gene isn't with us this week. I'm pleased to say that our operation was a complete success, and Gene will be checking in with us once in a while to make sure things are still going well.Ready to go, Timmy?

Timmy: Hmph.

Dr. Singh: What's the matter, little buddy? Didn't find a date?

Timmy: Well, I was gonna ask this older girl I know, but she went with some big, dumb oaf instead!

Dr. Singh: Don't worry, I'm sure you'll grow out of your awkward, gangly, miserable phase someday. At least you're not a mutant anymore, right?

Timmy: I guess. I don't wanna talk about the stupid prom. Let's just get this thing over with.

Dr. Singh: Not so fast, Mr. Sourpuss. We're not starting until you buck up a little. I won't have you slouching through the Evolving Item Report like you don't care! Put a smile on that face and let's hear a "jeepers."

Timmy: Jeepers.

Dr. Singh: Like you mean it!

Timmy: Jeepers!

Dr. Singh: Good! Doesn't that feel better?

Timmy: Y'know what, Doc? It does! You always know how to cheer a fella up.

Dr. Singh: Good. Let's get down to business. Our most exciting news: we've got a brand new evolving item this week! Saying the Death Whisper looks dangerous would be an understatement... it doesn't take a scientist to tell you that this thing is cursed. But I am a scientist, so mark my words: handle this thing with extreme caution!

-

Timmy: Holy smokes, Doc! It sounds horrifyin'! Can I touch it?

Dr. Singh: No! This item is only to be handled by responsible types who know what they're getting into. Viewers, you can get this item (at your own risk!) by visiting the Gaia Cash Shop. To get there, just move your mouse over the Market menu and select it from the drop-down list. So, moving on: in addition to the exciting new cursed item, we have three items evolving this week. Timmy, would you care to tell the nice people what they are?

Timmy: Sure! First, we got the Alruna's Rose, but the Doc said I'm not allowed to look at that one till I'm older. It sure does smell pretty, though! I hope I have one when I grow up. The Experiment is also gettin' a little bigger and scarier this week... I dunno, Doc, this one kinda freaks me out.

Dr. Singh: Why's that, friend?

Timmy: I guess I'm still kinda sour on mad science after that whole mutant thing. Who knows what kinda trouble this thing's gonna cause! The Dionaesil is growing again, too, but this one seems a tiny bit friendlier.

Dr. Singh: A few of the later generations of older items are completing their evolution, as well: the 7th generation Pantheracorax Agate and the 3rd generation Biancamella should be fully unlocked this week. Also, Hermes Moon will be leaving the shop on the 27th. Well, I suppose that's just about it for this week's Report. Say goodbye, Timmy!

Timmy: Bye bye!

May 16

Announcements: Dance the Night Away at the Gaia Prom!

Dr. Singh: Hi, everyone! And hello, Mr. Gambino! I just wanted to stop by and let you guys know that due to some technical issues, we won't be able to do our Evolving Item Report until early next week. We apologize for the delay!

Timmy: Awwwwww!

22 Cash Shop Update: The OMFG Box + Evolving Item Report

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy door1

• Topic Cash Shop Update: The OMFG Box + Evolving Item Report - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu May 22, 2008 7:09 pm

Timmy: Yeeeeeeeaaaaaaauuuuuughh!

Dr. Singh: Timmy! Timmy? What's wrong in there? Are you having a bad dream?

Timmy: It's real, Doc! It's evil and it's comin' to get me! Save yourself! Eeeeeeeee!

Dr. Singh: What are you talking about? Is there something in the room?

Timmy: Good gravy, it's scurryin' around! It's the evil thing! The one Gene told us about!

Dr. Singh: Let me in, Timmy! Open this door!

Timmy: I can't! If I get off the bed, it's gonna bite my feet! Run away, Doc! Burn down the house! Save yourself!

'*Shatter*

Dr. Singh: What was that noise?

Timmy: I think... I think it's gone! It jumped right out the window.

Dr. Singh: Open the door, Timmy. It may have left some evidence behind.

Timmy: No! Don't come in here! It might not be safe... plus, I drank six glasses of water before bed, and I just got mighty scared, soooo... I think we're gonna need a new quilt...

Dr. Singh: Argh! Why didn't you go before bed?

Timmy: Yeah... sorry, Doc... gonna need a new carpet, too. And some new wallpaper.

Dr. Singh: Yecch.

Timmy: It's my natural defense against predatory animals!

Dr. Singh: Well, now that you woke up the whole neighborhood with your screaming, maybe we should just go ahead and do the Evolving Item Report now.

Timmy: I dunno, I'm mighty traumatized right now...

Dr. Singh: Maybe it'll help get your mind of things. Plus, traumatized or not, we've got a job to do.

Timmy: Ehh... I guess, Doc... I'm just worried I'm gonna be emotionally scarred or somethin' unless I take a few minutes to settle down...

Dr. Singh: Buck up, little buddy! It'll only take a minutes, and we've got a pretty fun update today. We've got four items evolving this week, including two items reaching their final stages!

Timmy: That's nice, but...

Dr. Singh: Well, we might as well get this one over with... ugh... the Orindae has completed, and-- wait a minute! My lucky stars, Timmy! The hideous frog creature has undergone a remarkable transformation! It's... beautiful! Oh my, I wish I'd been nicer to it when it was a disgusting little warty tadpole.

Timmy: Hrm.

Dr. Singh: Next up, the White Drome Egg is reaching its final stage today after a long and eventful growing-up process, and its ultimate form reveals quite a shocking surprise! I'd say this has definitely been worth the wait, right?

Timmy: But I'm scared, Doc...

Dr. Singh: The Enchanted Book is continuing to bring its strange tale to life with an assortment of new fairytale apparitions, and the mystical energy of Inari's Bead is beginning to take shape. Some later generations of older items are also completing this week: 3rd Generation DandiiDooDad Spores. 8th generation Fausto's Bottles and 3rd generation Hermes' Moons have all finished evolving, meaning their full array of poses is unlocked.

Timmy: I'm just gonna go hide in the closet for a while.

Dr. Singh: If you'd like to pick up an evolving item for yourself, just stop by the Gaia Cash Shop. To get there, move your mouse over the Market menu and select it from the drop-down list. That's all for this week, folks! Sorry for waking you up in the middle of the night. Apologize for screaming at the nice people, Timmy!

...Timmy?

29 Evolving Item Report: Furugasa & Alruna's Rose

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy ruined

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Furugasa & Alruna's Rose - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu May 29, 2008 8:06 pm

Dr. Singh: Hey, everyone! Welcome to the Evolving Item Report, your trusted source for exclusive info on the Cash Shop's hottest items. I've got my little hyperactive pal Timmy here to help out... say hi, Timmy!

Timmy: ...

Dr. Singh: Timmy! Hello?

Timmy: Oh... sorry, Doc... what were you saying?

Dr. Singh: I notice that you're not your usual exuberant self, Timmy. What's the matter?

Timmy: Can't sleep... it's the evil thing... evil thing's gonna YEEP! ...gonna get me...

Dr. Singh: Snap out of it, Timmy! You'll be just fine. You just have to quit your yeeping and shake off your terror, because being traumatized won't do you any good. Right? Now, let's get down to business.

Timmy: Ehh...

-

Dr. Singh: Big news, everyone: we've got another brand new evolving item this week! The Furugasa seems to be an antique umbrella from the far Orient... it's beautifully crafted, but there's something not quite... right about it. Doesn't it seem a little creepy to you, Timmy?

Timmy: I'm already scared, Doc... get that thing away from me.

Dr. Singh: Being a scientist, I'm not too well-versed in the paranormal, but my gut tells me that something spooky is a foot. To grab a Furugasa for yourself, just visit the Gaia Cash Shop:

Timmy: The evil thing... it will devour us all...

Dr. Singh: Quiet, you! Anyway, we've also got an item evolving this week: Alruna's Rose is continuing to burst forth with seductive energy. If you own Alruna's Rose, you can view the new pose by visiting the Avatar screen, removing the item from your avatar and reequipping it.

Timmy: Evil... engulfing the world...

Dr. Singh: That's it for this week, folks! We'll be back next week with more evolving item info. Say goodnight, Timmy!

Timmy: Goodnight... forever...

June

05 Evolving Item Report: Death Whisper, Dionaesil, Inari's Bead

[NPC] Dr. Singh and Timmy ruined2

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Death Whisper, Dionaesil, Inari's Bead - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Jun 05, 2008 3:25 pm

Dr. Singh: Good afternoon, Gaians! Welcome to the Evolving Item Report, the exclusive news source for Gaia's coolest items. We'll try to keep it short and sweet today, just like my little friend Timmy. How's it going, buddy?

Timmy: It beckons... it draws us into the... YEEP! ...depths of madness.

Dr. Singh: Oh, Timmy! Are you still all hung up on that evil bit of you that escaped the lab? For all you know, it's harmless! Let's just calm down and get to work, OK?

Timmy: The hungry soil of Gaia shall be nourished with the blood of the innocent. The evil thing shall spare no one. Jeepers!

Dr. Singh: Fine, have it your way. Looks like I'll just have to do this alone. We've got three items evolving this week, folks: first up, the baleful dagger known as the Death Whisper has undergone its first transformation today, and its curse seems to be gaining a tighter grasp on its wearers. If there's anything you should be afraid of, Timmy, it's this!

-

Timmy: I see... a forest of bones...

Dr. Singh: No you don't! Stop entertaining your grim hallucinations and focus on the positive: Inari's Beads, one of our newer evolving items, has evolved this week. I'm detecting a rather playful spirit here. What do you think, Timmy?

Timmy: Urrrghh...

Dr. Singh: Last but not least, the Dionaesil is continuing to grow at a rapid pace. We might have to buy a bigger greenhouse soon!

Timmy: I gotta lie down, Doc. The visions... they're horrible...

Dr. Singh: Fine, go be traumatized somewhere else. I'll just finish this up by myself, since apparently I can't count on my so-called sidekick to keep his mental composure for five minutes! Maybe we'd better bring someone in next week to help you with this whole... thing. To wrap this up, here are the generations of older items that are completing their evolution today: The 9th generation of Fausto's Bottle, the 4th generation of Hermes' Moon and the 4th generation of Biancamella.

To pick up an evolving item of your very own, go visit Flynn in the Gaia Cash Shop:

12 Evolving Item Report: Picolitrosso's Urn & More

[NPC] Dr. Singh alone

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Picolitrosso's Urn & More - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Jun 12, 2008 2:38 pm

Hello, everyone! Welcome to the Evolving Item Report. I'm Dr. Singh, and this is... oh, right, Timmy's not here this week. He's been acting very strange lately, so I took him to some sort of a therapist to see if we can figure out what's up with that crazy little noggin of his.

I guess that leaves me all alone this time, so I'll be presenting the week's scientific reportage myself. We seem to have quite an exciting suite of evolutions, with one item reaching its final stage and two of our most popular items undergoing interesting transformations.

-

Before we get into that, I just wanted to mention our brand-new evolving item, Picolitrosso's Urn. I'm detecting a high degree of volatility in these mysterious ashes, so I have a hunch that we can expect some unusual surprises from this item. My calculations indicate that extra poses may spring up unexpectedly in the future, even on weeks when the item's not evolving... I've also managed to extrapolate that the urn's first full evolution will occur approximately two weeks from today. This is definitely an item to watch!

Elsewhere in the evolving item world, the Enchanted Book continues to weave its mystifying story this week. Every new page seems to reveal astounding surprises... I can't put it down! Alruna's Rose, another of our favorite items, has also evolved again. I wish Timmy were here to see this, since boys his age are always quite curious about items like this.

And last but not least, some exciting news from the world of mad science: The Experiment has reached its terrifying conclusion! Owners of first-generation Experiments can now freely use all of the beaker's many bizarre stages. After that whole thing with Timmy mutating, I have kind of a soft spot for grim scientific travesties. Aww!

Some later stages of older items are also finishing up their evolution this week. The second generation of the White Drome Egg and the second generation of the Orindae are now fully evolved and unlocked.

That's all for this week, folks! Timmy will be back next week with a little more of his inimitable folksy wit and wisdom. Remember: you can pick up Picolitrosso's Urn and many other great evolving items in the Gaia Cash Shop!

Ooh, and one more thing: each week, Gaia's artists run a little poll to see what your current favorite evolving item is. If you'd like to vote, just visit this thread.

19 Evolving Item Report: Furugasa, Inari's Beads, Death Whisper

[NPC] Dr. Singh, Timmy, and Dr. Schadenkind doc 1

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Furugasa, Inari's Beads, Death Whisper - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Jun 19, 2008 6:49 pm

Dr. Singh: Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to your weekly Evolving Item Report! We've got plenty of ground to cover today. Not only do we have a whole slew of cool evolutions to report, but we've also got a very special guest! This is Dr. Schadenkind, one of Gaia's most prominent psychoanalysts (he had the biggest ad in the phone book), and he's been working with Timmy to cure him of his nervous mumblings and delusions of imminent world destruction by some kind of evil force.

Dr. Schadenkind: Hallo, yes.

Dr. Singh: We'll check in with the doctor in a little while. For now, let's get started on this week's evolutions! You ready, Timmy?

Timmy: An age of darkness... a yacht of skulls upon an ocean of boiling blood...

Dr. Singh: I'll take that as a "yes." We've got three items evolving this week. First up, as I predicted last week, Picolitrosso's Urn seems to have sprung up a minor extra pose... how strange! It hasn't undergone a full evolution yet, though; that will likely happen next week. Elsewhere, the Furugasa is getting even spookier! I worry about showing an item like this to Timmy, what with his fragile mental state and all, but, y'know, what the hey. Take a look, Timmy!

Timmy: YEEP!

Dr. Singh: See? Pretty scary. Next up, Inari's Beads are continuing to grow; their animal spirit seems to becoming yet more prominent this week. I'm very excited to see where this one goes, as it seems to have a playful, benevolent energy about it. Maybe I should show Timmy, just to soothe his jangled nerves a bit... nah, there's no time. Next, we've got...

Timmy: A vast desert of powdered bone... say, Doc, is that the Death Whisper? Lookin' pretty swell this week, huh?

Dr. Singh: Why yes, it is! Congratulations on your moment of lucidity, you adorable little nutcase. The Death Whisper has undergone another transformation, and its curse seems to be creeping further onto the bodies of its owners. In other news, one of our creepiest evolving items is leaving the Cash Shop this week: The Experiment, having run its grisly scientific course, will leave the shop next week. It's your last chance to meddle with the darkest, dangliest nether-bits of mad science!

Dr. Schadenkind: I am detecting ze... innuendo here.

Dr. Singh: And finally, the fifth generation of Hermes' Moon will be completing its evolution this week.

To get one of these fantastic evolving items for yourself, just visit our friend Flynn at the Gaia Cash Shop. Tell her Dr. Singh sent you!

So, let's turn things over to Dr. Schadenkind to see if he's made any progress with Timmy's disturbed little mind.

Dr. Schadenkind: Yes. Vell, I am detecting zat ze boy underwent some trauma recently. Now, as you can see, ze little boy's evil impulses are beink sublimated into ze yeeping unt ze stuttering, ze trembling unt ze mumbles, unt whatnot.

Timmy: Evil... YEEP! ...impulses?

Dr. Schadenkind: Correct. Ze evil impulses.

Dr. Singh: Wait just a minute here, Dr. Schadenkind. Are you saying Timmy still has some evil in him? I thought that all got removed during his genetic surgery...

Dr. Schadenkind: Ah! But you see, ze evil of ze body is the same as ze evil in ze mind. Ze boy vas exposed to much evil during ze mutation ordeal, unt it has left ze deep psychic scars.

Dr. Singh: So what are you saying?

Dr. Schadenkind: Vell, to put it in ze simple terms, zis boy has gone... utterly mad!

Timmy: Golly!

Dr. Singh: Hmm. "Utterly mad"? Isn't that a rather unusual clinical diagnosis, doctor?

Dr. Schadenkind: Vell... you see... the boy is vat ve in ze psychoanalytic profession like to call "coo-coo in the coconut."

Dr. Singh: Don't you mean "coo-coo in ze coconut"?

Dr. Schadenkind: Ehh... vell...

Dr. Singh: You're just faking that accent, aren't you?

Dr. Schadenkind: None of your %$&@ing beeswax, lady! Jeez! Just let me do my job, OK? The accent is part of my whole "thing." It's like you don't understand psychoanalysis at all! Look, just don't screw this up for me, lady. Do I come to your office and make fun of your fake accent? @#%$! You're crazy! You're crazier than the kid! It's just an accent, OK? Listen, lady, I've been doing this a long time. Remember those degrees on my wall? Those aren't fake. Most of them. I'm a @%#&ing professional, as in "lady, you need professional help," and I don't have to stand here and listen to your $%&@ing horsecrap! You got that?

Dr. Singh: Riiiight...

Timmy: Sooooo...

Dr. Singh: Yeeaaah...

Dr. Schadenkind: Maybe you should... I don't know... kinda forget that I said that?

Dr. Singh: Anyway... that's about it for this week. Remember, guys, you can vote for your favorite evolving item every week in our little informal poll in the Gaia Community Discussion forum. Ciao!

20 Evolving Item Report: Kelp o'th' Lock & Others

[NPC] Dr. Singh, Timmy, and Dr. Schadenkind doc1

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Kelp o'th' Lock & Others - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jun 20, 2008 6:31 pm

Dr. Singh: Hello, everyone! Welcome to the Evolving Item Report, your finest source of information about all your favorite items. We've got a special guest with us, too. Once again, the renowned Dr. Schadenkind is here to help Timmy work through his emotional problems. But first, let's take care of this week's evolving item news. Ready, Timmy?

Timmy: The evil thing... consuming my mind...

Dr. Singh: Oh, Timmy, will you ever let that go? Anyway, a new evolving item arrived this week! The Kelp o'th' Lock is a strange one indeed. It appears at first to be seaweed!

Timmy: Yuck! Who would wanna buy seaweed, Doc?

Dr. Singh: This is no ordinary seaweed, Timmy. If my theory holds true, this may have come from a very unusual lake. I surmise it is only a matter of time before the seaweed reveals its true form, whatever that may be! For now I would recommend giving it plenty of water.

If you'd like to pick one up, why not stop by the Gaia Cash Shop and see my good friend Flynn?

Timmy: A sea of darkness that never ends... horrible screams and shrieks. Arms reaching up for hope that never comes. Then silence. Terrible silence...

Dr. Singh: Good idea, Timmy, let's use your silent voice. Okay, now that that's settled, Picolitrosso's Urn seems to have undergone its first evolution, revealing yet more mystery. Somehow I feel we have a ways to go before we know its true nature.

Timmy: We'll all be in urns soon...

Dr. Singh: Moving on, Dionaesil continues its perplexing growth. Perhaps this plant has been getting too much water and sunlight? That is, if it is a plant.... Alruna's Rose continues its alluring evolution. I'm afraid it's gotten a little too revealing for you to see, Timmy. Maybe when you're older.

Timmy: Yeep!

Dr. Singh: And lastly, Biancamella is completing its fifth generation today!

Timmy: Say, Doc, why is there blood shootin' out of your eyes?

Dr. Singh: There's not, you silly boy! Shall we have a chat with Dr. Schadenkind? Good afternoon, Doctor.

Dr. Schadenkind: Hey, it's good to be back.

Dr. Singh: So, no accent zis veek?

Dr. Schadenkind: Shut it, lady. Just %#@&#ing let it go.

Dr. Singh: Touchy! Come on, you're a psychiatrist. Shouldn't you be able to get those emotions under control?

Dr. Schadenkind: Look, lady, don't you tell me to get my %$&#ing emotions under control. See this balding, prematurely grey head up here? This is mine. This is my brain, and I get to do whatever I $%#&ing want with it, OK? Now let's just drop this whole topic and figure out what's wrong with this little nutcase of a kid, alright?

Dr. Singh: Fair enough.

Dr. Schadenkind: Well, it seems simple. Something gave this kid a wild case of the fantods, and now he's basically freaking out all the time. I'm sure you've noticed.

Dr. Singh: What do you think caused all this?

Dr. Schadenkind: Hell if I know, lady. You know him better than I do. I've talked to him, but he's pretty tough to understand through all the muttering and chattering. Sounds like he saw something so alarming, so horrifying beyond comprehension, that he's been intensely traumatized. Maybe he saw you before you put your makeup on in the morning, I don't know. What? Why are you asking me?

Dr. Singh: Because you're charging me thousands of Gold per hour!

Dr. Schadenkind: Oh, so that means I'm a toy, right? I'm just a piece of meat over here, just some little diagnosing machine that you can poke at and prod at? You're sick, lady. You're a sick person and you need help.

Dr. Singh: I'm just asking if--

Dr. Schadenkind: Just let me do my job for one %$&@ing second, OK? Fine. Good. Let me talk to the kid. What's the kid's name?

Dr. Singh: Timmy.

Dr. Schadenkind: I didn't ask your name, you crazy lunatic, I'm asking the kid's name.

Dr. Singh: His name is Timmy.

Dr. Schadenkind: Look, I don't know what kind of a sick little game you're playing, lady, but I don't need to be a part of it. Just let me do my job. Kid! Tell me what happened.

Timmy: The evil thing... it talked to me... it talked to my mind...

Dr. Schadenkind: What kind of an evil thing are we talking about? Like a monster? No! Don't tell me! Bet I can get it in twenty. OK, so animal, vegetable or mineral?

Timmy: Animal... or mineral...

Dr. Schadenkind: Bigger than a breadbox?

Timmy: Nuh-uh.

Dr. Schadenkind: Is it... a baseball?

Timmy: No, more evil.

Dr. Schadenkind: A hockey puck?

Dr. Singh: Ugh. Sounds like this is going to take a while. I guess I'll let these two nutcases duke it out for a while. At least they keep each other busy, right? Stay tuned next week for another exciting update! Remember: if you want to share your opinions with Gaia's staff about which items you like best, they're always happy to hear from you! You can start with our little poll in the Gaia Community Discussion forum. Bye bye!

28 Evolving Item Report: Kelp o'th' Lock & Others (Resent)

[NPC] Dr. Singh, Timmy, and Dr. Schadenkind doc1

• Topic Evolving Item Report: Kelp o'th' Lock & Others (Resent) - Posted: [NPC] Dr. Singh Sat Jun 28, 2008 1:04 pm

[Editor's note: a hiccup in our notification system caused some people to not receive this EI report, so we're resending it -- sorry for the duplication if you've already seen this.]

Dr. Singh: Hello, everyone! Welcome to the Evolving Item Report, your finest source of information about all your favorite items. We've got a special guest with us, too. Once again, the renowned Dr. Schadenkind is here to help Timmy work through his emotional problems. But first, let's take care of this week's evolving item news. Ready, Timmy?

Timmy: The evil thing... consuming my mind...

Dr. Singh: Oh, Timmy, will you ever let that go? Anyway, a new evolving item arrived this week! The Kelp o'th' Lock is a strange one indeed. It appears at first to be seaweed!

Timmy: Yuck! Who would wanna buy seaweed, Doc?

Dr. Singh: This is no ordinary seaweed, Timmy. If my theory holds true, this may have come from a very unusual lake. I surmise it is only a matter of time before the seaweed reveals its true form, whatever that may be! For now I would recommend giving it plenty of water.

If you'd like to pick one up, why not stop by the Gaia Cash Shop and see my good friend Flynn?

Timmy: A sea of darkness that never ends... horrible screams and shrieks. Arms reaching up for hope that never comes. Then silence. Terrible silence...

Dr. Singh: Good idea, Timmy, let's use your silent voice. Okay, now that that's settled, Picolitrosso's Urn seems to have undergone its first evolution, revealing yet more mystery. Somehow I feel we have a ways to go before we know its true nature.

Timmy: We'll all be in urns soon...

Dr. Singh: Moving on, Dionaesil continues its perplexing growth. Perhaps this plant has been getting too much water and sunlight? That is, if it is a plant.... Alruna's Rose continues its alluring evolution. I'm afraid it's gotten a little too revealing for you to see, Timmy. Maybe when you're older.

Timmy: Yeep!

Dr. Singh: And lastly, Biancamella is completing its fifth generation today!

Timmy: Say, Doc, why is there blood shootin' out of your eyes?

Dr. Singh: There's not, you silly boy! Shall we have a chat with Dr. Schadenkind? Good afternoon, Doctor.

Dr. Schadenkind: Hey, it's good to be back.

Dr. Singh: So, no accent zis veek?

Dr. Schadenkind: Shut it, lady. Just %#@&#ing let it go.

Dr. Singh: Touchy! Come on, you're a psychiatrist. Shouldn't you be able to get those emotions under control?

Dr. Schadenkind: Look, lady, don't you tell me to get my %$&#ing emotions under control. See this balding, prematurely grey head up here? This is mine. This is my brain, and I get to do whatever I $%#&ing want with it, OK? Now let's just drop this whole topic and figure out what's wrong with this little nutcase of a kid, alright?

Dr. Singh: Fair enough.

Dr. Schadenkind: Well, it seems simple. Something gave this kid a wild case of the fantods, and now he's basically freaking out all the time. I'm sure you've noticed.

Dr. Singh: What do you think caused all this?

Dr. Schadenkind: Hell if I know, lady. You know him better than I do. I've talked to him, but he's pretty tough to understand through all the muttering and chattering. Sounds like he saw something so alarming, so horrifying beyond comprehension, that he's been intensely traumatized. Maybe he saw you before you put your makeup on in the morning, I don't know. What? Why are you asking me?

Dr. Singh: Because you're charging me thousands of Gold per hour!

Dr. Schadenkind: Oh, so that means I'm a toy, right? I'm just a piece of meat over here, just some little diagnosing machine that you can poke at and prod at? You're sick, lady. You're a sick person and you need help.

Dr. Singh: I'm just asking if--

Dr. Schadenkind: Just let me do my job for one %$&@ing second, OK? Fine. Good. Let me talk to the kid. What's the kid's name?

Dr. Singh: Timmy.

Dr. Schadenkind: I didn't ask your name, you crazy lunatic, I'm asking the kid's name.

Dr. Singh: His name is Timmy.

Dr. Schadenkind: Look, I don't know what kind of a sick little game you're playing, lady, but I don't need to be a part of it. Just let me do my job. Kid! Tell me what happened.

Timmy: The evil thing... it talked to me... it talked to my mind...

Dr. Schadenkind: What kind of an evil thing are we talking about? Like a monster? No! Don't tell me! Bet I can get it in twenty. OK, so animal, vegetable or mineral?

Timmy: Animal... or mineral...

Dr. Schadenkind: Bigger than a breadbox?

Timmy: Nuh-uh.

Dr. Schadenkind: Is it... a baseball?

Timmy: No, more evil.

Dr. Schadenkind: A hockey puck?

Dr. Singh: Ugh. Sounds like this is going to take a while. I guess I'll let these two nutcases duke it out for a while. At least they keep each other busy, right? Stay tuned next week for another exciting update! Remember: if you want to share your opinions with Gaia's staff about which items you like best, they're always happy to hear from you! You can start with our little poll in the Gaia Community Discussion forum. Bye bye!

30 Cash Shop Update: New Evolving Item!

[NPC] Flynn

• Topic Cash Shop Update: New Evolving Item! - Posted: [NPC] Flynn Mon Jun 30, 2008 2:35 pm

Hi, guys! We've got an unexpected treat in the Cash Shop today: I just got a call from Dr. Singh, saying that a cache of incredibly strange and probably dangerous eggs had been found at a sacred site in the mountains, and she's shipping them over to sell as evolving items. I can only guess what might be inside these things, but I'd be really careful if I were you.

-

But then again, isn't that half the fun of evolving items? The danger, the mystery, the thrill of the unexpected... anyway, you can pick up the Yama no Tamago in the Cash Shop today!

Due to a technical goof, you may have seen this announcement twice. Apologies if we spammed you!