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NPC:Dr. Singh

The Evolving Item Report for 2015.

JanuaryEdit

02 Evolving Item Report: My Dearly Damned and Pocket Paws!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: My Dearly Damned and Pocket Paws! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jan 02, 2015 2:43 pm

Hey there Sciencers! It's another lovely day for conducting extreme experimentation! At this point, the EI Labs would like me to remind you that in order to interact with our lovely Evolving Items, you do have to sign a few certain disclaimers and such. No worries, it's all a formality. You're statistically much more likely to end up with a fine selection of useful mutations than the alternatives. What are the alternatives, you ask? Well, that's part of the beauty of scientific discovery: we can find out together! Speaking of discovery, there have been some amazing new developments taking place for our fabulous Evolving Items! Grab your notebooks, and let's observe:

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My Dearly Damned: They agreed to meet again, the angel eagerly, the demon reluctantly but unable to resist, and one meeting turned to two, then four, then countless times. They spoke about their worlds, strictly intellectually at first, until eventually they smiled and laughed and talked about anything and nothing at all. They would argue about it later, because Serotina was stubborn and embarrassed, but he was definitely the one who kissed Roseus first, not the other way around.

In this time, as their love for each other grew, so did their fear that they would be discovered. They had nothing to lose initially, when they were merely curious about each other, but now, it was everything. One night, the demon overheard one of his brothers talking with another about how the angels were preparing to send one of their executioners, the Wheel, after a rogue who was thought to be consorting with demons; he fled home to Roseus and they embraced, and swore a vow to one another. "Even if we are apart..." Roseus murmured. "We shall never be parted." Serotina finished.

Then, just as the Wheel was upon them, they opened the book and banished themselves to the void between worlds. The spell was vicious, and pulled them away from each other.

[Animal] Her Pocket Paw & [Animal] His Pocket Paw

After a few pokes and prods your new baby emerges triumphantly from it's egg. Aghhhh! It's so cute when it's a newborn. It's probably about 75% head which you believe is the correct ratio of head to body for newborns (or maybe you read it in Gaia Cute Things 101 textbook?). You can't wait to begin nurturing your new baby by feeding it, teaching it and playing games. But before you can decide what fun activity to choose, your digital baby squishes it's face pixels into a grimace and lets out...

... let's just say you're glad you didn't go with the version that comes with scents.


Have you drawn the appropriate diagrams, charts, and little margin doodles? Science is all about being thorough! Being quite honest, science is all about a lot of things. But I digress-- I'll be taking off now for a lovely research trip to the untold centers of Gaia deepest caverns. While I'm away, why not vote in our Weekly EI Poll and share your favorites! If you'd like to check out these amazing Evolving Items in person, please visit La Victoire! Until next time, Scienteers!


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09 EI Report: My Dearly Damned and Pocket Paws!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: My Dearly Damned and Pocket Paws! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jan 27, 2012 5:59 pm

Happy day, Sciencers! To be perfectly honest, I haven't been doing as much traditional science as I should lately. Chemical reactions abound in the kitchen, though, and I've been baking up a storm! Have you ever wanted to make a delicious brownie in only your microwave? It's so simple-- just a little dash of science and voilà! Here's how to do it: 4 tablespoons of flour, 4 tablespoons of sugar, 2 tablespoons of cocoa powder, 2 tablespoons of vegetable oil, 2 tablespoons of water, just the teeniest pinch of salt, and a big scoop of scientific ingenuity! Stir it up and put that concoction in a coffee mug. Set your microwave to one minute or so and you'll be in chocolate heaven in no time! Er, but back to the science, of course: My Dearly Damned and our two lovable Pocket Paw evolving items have made some amazing developments! Let's observe:

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My Dearly Damned: The nature of the void is not fixed, simultaneously as small as a room and as large as a universe. One could wander for eternity and not find something right beside them, or they could be light years apart and suddenly turn and see each other. If they exited, they could be in any universe, any dimension, out of infinite possibilities, and knew they should only do so together. Parted, they had no hope and every hope of finding one another again. They were at the mercy of the void. This in mind, they held out what hope they could, and searched for each other for many years.

Unfortunately, the Wheel was also drawn into the void through the portal they made... It had been so long, and not long at all, when Roseus turned one day and saw it.

[Animal] Her Pocket Paw & [Animal] His Pocket Paw

You wake up to the delightful chirping of your Pocket Paw from your beside table. During the night your precious digital baby evolved into the toddler phase. Time to baby proof all the sharp pixel corners, but first that growing toddler has a growing appetite! Luckily you can now feed your baby whole milk. Phew! Formula was getting really expensive.


What delectable new developments! Maybe I've got sweets and snacks on the brain, but I must say that these latest changes to our Evolving Items have made for quite the tasty treat! Soon, my research on sweet, short-chain, soluble carbohydrates will have to come to an end, but I'm excited to return my attentions to the ever-changing world of our amazing Evolving Items! Speaking of which, if you'd like to get your hands on one of these masterpieces, simply visit La Victoire! And don't forget to vote for your favorites in the latest Weekly EI Poll! I'll be off scavenging for new disaccharides, but I'll be back next week to share more slices of science with you!


Visit La Victoire!

16 My Dearly Damned, Pocket Paws, and Zodiacal: Equinox!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement My Dearly Damned, Pocket Paws, and Zodiacal: Equinox! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Tue Dec 13, 2011 3:29 pm

Some days, Sciencers, it's a bleak and uneventful week of hypothesizing and pouring acidic stuff into basic stuff. Not this week however! We've got not one, not two, but three new developments taking center stage here in the EI Labs! In fact, ever since we installed that stage in the research department, a lot of things have found their way to the center. Maybe it's in the way? I didn't think we even used that room for anything other than karaoke night. You know how the saying goes: Science hard, party hard! Now whip out those notepads or frilly electronic doodads, and let's observe the changes these fascinating specimens have undergone:

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[Animal] Her Pocket Paw & [Animal] His Pocket Paw

Your precious pixelated darling spent a night full of food and wrapped in a digital blanket. When you wake up you see that they've had yet another growth spurt! Your baby is now ready for school (they grow up so fast don't they?) If you want a leg up and to have a well adjusted pixel adult you'll have to send them to the best private school!

My Dearly Damned: Serotina heard the cry across the light years and dimensions, his name howled into the void, lancing him like a harpoon and reeling him across the impossible space to its source. He threw out his wings and flew as fast as he could, for what felt like ages, and no time at all.

When he found his husband, the Wheel was already gone. Roseus had slipped into a pocket of the void, a not quite real secret place, a lovely golden field and warm sky. He lay among the grasses, pink and white and red. Serotina found him, and collapsed, wailed.

According to the laws of his people, Roseus had been executed.

Serotina wept. He wept until he had no tears left, until he wept blood, until his very essence streamed from him, and his body collapsed, and he became the soil that covered the grave of his lover. They would be together forever.

Zodiacal: Equinox: This month, the Astrolabe has turned toward the constellation of Capricorn! Practical, ambitious, and patient, Capricorns are sure to have successes follow them where ever they tread.


Whew! What a hefty update, Scienteers! My heart is aglow and yet somehow broken. Is this something that needs medical attention? I won't worry about it for now. I'm sure that enough experimentation can cure all of my woes in good time. As for yourselves, be sure to vote in the Weekly EI Poll and support your favorites! I'm headed out for now, but I'll be back to share the next major breakthrough. Venture to La Victoire to get your hands on these Evolving Items. Be safe out there, my little test subjects-- er, junior scientists!


Visit La Victoire!

23 EI Report: Pocket Paws and the Finale of My Dearly Damned!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: Pocket Paws and the Finale of My Dearly Damned! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jan 23, 2015 7:19 pm

Have you heard the fascinating news, Sciencers? Why, the prestigious and illustrious TECH Conference has asked Gaia's very own EI Labs to create a presentation for their famous TECH Talks program! Why, that's practically the scientific equivalent of making it in show business. I don't doubt that the paparazzi is just moments away from swarming in here to pry into the deepest details of our mundane daily lives and publicize it for the world to fawn over. Until the media wave hits, let's hold fast to our scientific passions and continue making the important advancements. To inspire all my favorite junior scientists to never give up, we worked all night to document this latest update to the Pocket Paws Evolving item. Sadly, while we were focused on feeding and playing with our cute pixel pets, the gripping saga of My Dearly Damned came to an end. I wish we could have been there to see it, but I'm also quite glad I wasn't there for...the incident... I'll not tarry further, Gaians. Observe for yourselves:

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[Animal] Her Pocket Paw & [Animal] His Pocket Paw


Woah, how did your digital child grow up so fast! They're already taking Advanced Algebra and earning college credits. You feel like it was only 4 weeks ago this Friday that you were changing diapers. Your digital paw is almost ready to go out into the real world but you have to keep them on track with their studies. You'll need to use a little discipline because you noticed they've been using their electronic devices during class and teachers are starting to send notes. UGHH parenting is hard!


My Dearly Damned: "And then they say that flowers grew there. Maroon and dark red blossoms. And pink butterflies and small birds came to land on them." The child closed the homemade book emphatically. "The end."

Father's mouth gaped and Papa's face was pale. "That's a really sad ending, Filaree," Father said.

Fil sniffed indignantly. "It's sad on purpose! It makes you think about all the happy things in your life and appreciate them."

The parents shared a look. This wasn't the first time the child had shocked them; their offspring would naturally always fall between light and dark, saintly and impish, loving and a little bit wicked. But they had each always been a bit of both anyway, and were all quite content living there together. Aside from the kid's hobby of writing really tragic RPF. That was pretty weird.

As they tucked the child into bed with a goodnight kiss, Papa seemed distracted. Later, as they closed the door to their room, in their little dark house on the golden field, Serotina suddenly whirled and drew Roseus into a fierce embrace.

"It could have been true," Serotina murmured in the dark. "Fil's story. If I hadn't found you in time and helped you defeat the Wheel... If I hadn't..."

"...Impossible." Roseus whispered, holding his husband tighter. "I could never have left you with such an unhappy ending."


Ha! See, I'm no stuffed-shirt uptight scientist. You fell for it, didn't you! See, these are the kinds of lighthearted moments I'll miss when my team and I are unfortunately very, very famous. The true ambassador of science lives for the beauty of experimentation, not the dozens of roses or autograph signing sessions that come with success. Someday, Scienteers, you may find yourselves on the brink of becoming a scientific legend, and then you'll remember the grand finale of My Dearly Damned and feel totally embarrassed about this moment. Humility is very respectable among the science community. On that note, please don't forget to vote for your favorite Evolving Item in the Weekly EI Poll, and visit my friends at La Victoire to discover your own My Dearly Damned 2nd Gen. or [Animal] Pocket Paw!


Visit La Victoire!

30 EI Report: His Pocket Paw & Her Pocket Paw FinaleEdit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: His Pocket Paw & Her Pocket Paw Finale - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jan 30, 2015 5:56 pm

Greetings, Sciencers!

If you haven't yet hopped on the digital lifestyle bandwagon, now is a lovely time to start! Why, the world of science and technology have come up with digital alternatives to most of life's grandest experiences. It's a great way to save yourself the trouble. Going to school? Try an online class! Getting dressed? Why, that's what avatars are for! Social interaction? We're doing it right now! Getting married? A definite possibility. The most refined simulation we have is definitely in the realm virtual of pet care, though. Have you seen the revolutionary conclusion to the tale of our amazing Pocket Paws? Let's observe!

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[Animal] Her Pocket Paw & [Animal] His Pocket Paw

As a responsible digital pet owner you've done an amazing job raising your pixel prodigy. You were there for every beep to feed them, clean them, play with them and discipline them. So it's no wonder when you wake up this morning to find your child is all grown up. tears

They're going to grow up to become responsible adults with 401k plans, homeowner's insurance and pre-nup agreements. poof Oh wait, darn they died. Where's that reset button.


Wow Sciencers! I had no idea that rearing childr-- pets was such a vastly rewarding emotional rollercoaster! I mean, I've had my fair share of bothersome child sidekicks and immature interns hanging around the EI Labs, but this is something so much more precious. That said, if we reset it again, let's make sure that we get the best possible pet with the best possible stats. It's just data after all! Tune in next week for another wonderful Evolving Item Report. Keep experimenting, Scienteers! Don't forget to visit La Victoire to get your own Pocket Paw!


Visit La Victoire

February Edit

06 Evolving Item Report: Introducing My Bloody Valentine!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Introducing My Bloody Valentine! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jan 30, 2015 5:54 pm

Greetings, Sciencers! As you know, most animals on this strange yet endearing planet have a particular time of the year when they prefer to partner off. Mating season is not a trend in humans, but I do like to point out the scientific parallels between a traditional mating season and our yearly Valentine's Day celebrations. It's peculiar, isn't it? Research can reveal so much, but has no evidence that supports the reasoning behind romance flourishing in mid-February. On that note, it is important to realize that not every participant of the season even intends to find a romantic partner. Personally, I've no time for dating. Science is my only love interest, and we've a relationship built on trust, passion, and experimentation. Quite healthy! Likewise, the fantastic new Evolving Item currently undergoing study at the EI Labs has many a Valentine's tale to tell. Let's observe:

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My Bloody Valentine

There once was a lovely vampire
Quite a sight in her bedroom attire
Draculette she was named
Round the world she was famed
To inflame countless ladies' desire.
"Oh, I've no one to kiss," she does whine,
"No pretty necks upon which to dine."
Paging through old love letters
Some ex-flames she remembers,
Many beauties she called Valentine...


Ooh, such a gripping story! I'm unsure of how to record it, scientifically, but I think that a subject exhibiting such charisma and mysterious allure should really be studied a tad more intently. Perhaps we'll have to hire more interns for the task! Happy day! I love interns! They work for free, the volunteer as test subject for free, and they leave me free to go exploring while they do the tedious lab work. Ah, I can feel my heart warming already. I guess it really must be the season for affection! Of course, you'll simply have to wait until next week to reach the next milestone in the tale of My Bloody Valentine. You can pick up your own prototype version in La Victoire in the meantime. Keep studying, Scienteers!


Visit La Victoire!

13 EI Report: My Bloody Valentine & Zodiacal: Equinox!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: My Bloody Valentine & Zodiacal: Equinox! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jun 19, 2009 7:02 pm

Hey Sciencers! It's time for yet another one of my famous Evolving Item escapades! You see, this latest specimen has advanced in such a drastic way that we couldn't hope to contain it in a mere beaker or box. In fact, we couldn't keep it in the lab at all. That's why it lives out here in this giant geodesic bio-isolation chamber, where it can be observed in all it's evolutionary splendor. If you're feeling quite fearless and altogether sciencey (that's a technical term, of course,) we can observe the amazing new changes to My Bloody Valentine together! Oh, it seem as if Zodiacal: Equinox has made some developments as well:

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My Bloody Valentine

In Renaissance France was Marie
Fond of nibbling biscuits and brie
Poor Marie lost her head
and although not quite dead
One never neck-nibbles zombies


Zodiacal: Equinox: This month, the Astrolabe has turned towards the constellation Aquarius! Intelligent, concise, logical, and intuitive, the Aquarius person is well-loved and highly respected. An Aquarius is sure to bring a touch of class and dignified charm to any setting or gorgeous ensemble!


Fascinating! It seems as though we're still just scratching the surface of what lies in the mysterious inky depths of My Bloody Valentine's history. Perhaps our studies this week, along with our various pokes, prods, shocks, and chemical drips, will yield some new findings about who this dark diva is and why she likes her meat so very raw. Enjoy your romantic holiday, Gaians! We here at the labs are above such petty romantic attachments. You see, my true love is science. That said, I do secretly hope I receive an inflorescence of aromatic blooms from a love-stricken admirer... *sigh* Even the brilliant suffer from the want of a cheesy romance. Well, I'd better be off now! Be sure to stop by La Victoire to observe these Evolving Items from a closer vantage point. Good day, Scienteers!


Visit La Victoire!

20 Evolving Item Report: My Bloody Valentine!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: My Bloody Valentine! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Feb 20, 2015 6:36 pm

Greetings, Sciencers! You know, I suppose this is a bit of an un-sciency tangent, but with all the love in the air lately, it's getting increasingly hard to stay sane. I mean, of course my true love is Science, but that's no reason to isolate oneself from all form of loveydoveyness. Going to dinner and a movie with the concept of Science is a bit hard, you see. If there were someone out there who I felt was really my equal in depth when it comes to these sorts of matters would be the lovely Draculette. You see, much like I find solace in beakers and petri dishes, this vampiric heroine has a passion for all things rich in iron and spurting from neck wounds. I suppose we are both married to our work, so to speak. On that note, take a look below to observe the changes My Bloody Valentine has undergone as of late!

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My Bloody Valentine

Skelly Elly, a speakeasy dancer
Whose short skirts and long legs did entrance her,
Knocked back poisoned gin,
Did poor Elly right in!
Now she dances with a necromancer.


How quaint! I simply cannot wait for the next charming chapter of this delightful tale of love and loss to continue. Beloved Sciencers, please be sure to do all the assigned reading before our next update comes around on Friday. There will most certainly be a quiz! Meanwhile, Draculette and I are going to continue pursuing our passions in life and trying to have it all. Science, love, adventure, awards: All are completely attainable, given enough experimentation! Until next time, Scienteers!


Visit La Victoire!

27 Evolving Item Report: My Bloody Valentine!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: My Bloody Valentine! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Feb 20, 2015 6:35 pm

Salutations, Sciencers! I'm not sure if I've shared this before, but the EI Labs isn't the serious and stoic science-fueled research institution you may be imagining. You see, we've been adding a lot of wonderful policies lately to fuel the more artistic side of our employees and interns. We started off by instituting a Casual Friday. Once we realized to exactly what extent our researchers would embrace Casual Friday-- and let me assure you, it was horrific-- we put in place a Corporate Wednesday to encourage a bit more class. Of course that quickly went awry as well, as most of our safety gear was deemed too unprofessional to wear during the day. After many injury-related lawsuits, we decided that it would be much easier to just install a Dance Stomp Rotation arcade machine in the break room. Our free and open workplace environment must have spurred into motion some acts of pure genius-- You see, during a routine agitation, one of our lab technicians realized that what the solution really needed was less shaking and stirring and more dancing and grooving! After achieving a 100% perfect score on the hardest difficulty of the fastest song, the experiment being dutifully clutched by our science pioneer exploded into a complete success! Alas, so did the lab technician. Condolences to his family at home. While we here at the EI Labs have a brief moment of silence to commemorate the loss of our coworker (and our arcade machine) you can take a look at what our brave new scientific exploits have achieved!

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My Bloody Valentine

Yukiko was a fox from a fable,
But the fling soon became quite unstable
When an ex-paramour
Turned her into a fur,
Then consigned to a designer label.


Pretty amazing, right Scienteers? Dear Draculette has just the most awful luck in love, but each of the lovely people she reminisces about spending time with bring with them new and fabulous poses to share with us! Be sure to take a quick visit to La Victoire if you'd like to get your hands on the latest developments contained within My Bloody Valentine. Until next time, Sciencers!


Check It Out!

March Edit

06 Evolving Item Report: My Bloody Valentine!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: My Bloody Valentine! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Feb 20, 2015 6:35 pm

Greetings, Sciencers! It's a lovely, science-filled day here at the EI Labs. We found a way to improve company morale by tenfold and our production has gone through the roof ever since! Instead of actually performing experiments or making scientific advances, our latest theory supports the idea that progress can be made almost entirely in the mind. No need to run tests or verify your findings, just imagine that you did! Why, we've managed to cure almost every major disease (theoretically,) solve all problems of world hunger (theoretically,) and we've even figured out the secret to perpetual motion (theoretically!) The only people still doing physical experimentation are the lowly interns, whose delicate yet studious minds can't quite comprehend what we advanced engineers are working on (theoretically.) So while us enlightened science masters keep trudging forward with our difficult mental labors, please enjoy what the interns whipped up:

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My Bloody Valentine

Madam Anne’s love of whips sometimes stumped her,
Bruises certainly didn’t affront her,
But some nights Drak did need
To stay home, drink tea, and read,
So Anne found a new girlfriend and dumped her.


Another gripping addition to the tale of dear Draculette. Perhaps we should consider rewarding the interns for delivering us such a fascinating new installment, but we wouldn't want them get cocky and start asking for paid time off, or weekends, or a lunch break. So we'll simply admire their hard work from afar and toss small candies into the chemical storehouse they've set up shop in. Congratulations, dear protégés! And congratulations to all my aspiring Scienteers out there as well. If you'd like to examine this experiment a tad more closely, grab your thickest notepad and at least three mechanical pencils. You'll need them! Once you're ready, visit La Victoire to get started. Happy sciencing!


Visit La Victoire!

13 Evolving Item Report: The Finale of My Bloody Valentine!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: The Finale of My Bloody Valentine! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Mar 13, 2015 6:21 pm

Good new, Sciencers! We decided to change our policies on theoretical experimentation here at the EI Labs. All that new stuff we implemented under the assumption that performing actual experiments was frivolous and unnecessary turned out to be a total mistake. It also really freaked out a lot of the more imaginative scientists, who spent a lot of time theoretically ending the entire universe with a single theoretical mistake. To restore company spirit and to get things back on track, we put on our lab coats once more and headed back into the lab to do some good old fashioned sciencing! Luckily, the interns kept the place warm for us. Check out our homecoming project: It's the finale to the riveting tale of My Bloody Valentine!

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My Bloody Valentine

“A new cut and a blood daiquiri
Then I’ll be right as rain, fancy free~
So I’ll put on some lipstick
And I’ll upload a cute pic
Of my most favorite valentine: me!”


Ah! Applause please, for the stunning Draculette as she takes a bow. Bravo, bravo! If you'd like to pick up the next generation of this astounding Evolving Item, simply pick up a sample from our friends at La Victoire. I'd offer you a tour of the EI Labs to fetch your own, but it's become a tad dangerous in here as our more cautious technicians have begun stockpiling supplies and first aid kits to prepare for any potential world-threatening distastes they've theorized have a possibility taking place someday. Carry on, my delightful Scienteers!


Visit La Victoire!

20 EI Report: New Recon Pariah and changes to Zodiacal: EquinoxEdit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: New Recon Pariah and changes to Zodiacal: Equinox - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Mar 13, 2015 6:22 pm

Ahhh. Take a deep breath: It's a lovely day for experimenting, Sciencers!

The cool breeze is doing wonders for keeping me cool, so I don't even have to use an intern's valuable time to wipe the sweat from my brow! It also means that my hands aren't the least bit slippery, so I don't need two or three interns holding my various tubes and flasks! Honestly, I think I don't need the interns at all. In fact, it's a lovely day for some genetic experimentation...oh, did I say that aloud? Haha. Of COURSE I wouldn't dare! Their contracts don't really cover it. Anyways, while you're here, let's observe the latest development of Zodiacal Equinox and the brand new beeping and booping mystery unfolding with our latest new Evolving Item, Recon Pariah!

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Recon Pariah:
Brief: Department-standard surveillance unit recovered from site NS-[REDACTED], identified as implanted original in Recon Unit 897 Codename Pariah. Item recovered by Vulture squad alongside evidence contained in file I-Rep-L(897) and body of Trainee Recon Unit 482 (codename unassigned). Trainee Recon Unit 482 surveillance unit not discovered. Recommend search of Vulture squad personal effects.

Dispatch: Watchdog Blue and Watchdog Grey assigned.

Activate recording and eyewitness events leading up to Incident L(897).
███████████████ ██████████ █████.

Watchdog Blue: access confirmed.

Watchdog Grey is present in the system.

WARNING: scan has determined error in third-person encryption mechanism. Immersive simulation may occur. Proceed with caution.

Zodiacal: Equinox: This month, the Astrolabe has turned towards the constellation Pisces! Sensitive and loyal, the wild and artistic Pisces loves to make friends and live life to the fullest! This latest development shares with us some delicate and adorable new street styles!


What a fantastic development, Gaians! I can't wait to see what our mysterious new Evolving Item experiment will reveal for us next week. It keeps making the strangest sounds. Perhaps a few pokes, prods, and zaps from our R&D team will prompt some amazing new developments! I'll let you in on the finds of our study as soon as I can. Until then, good luck with your hypothesizing, my favorite Scienteers!


Check It Out!

27 Evolving Item Report: Recon Pariah!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Recon Pariah! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Mar 27, 2015 5:00 pm

Greetings, Scienteers! I'm excited to welcome you back to the lab. Care for a tour? Before we begin, I'll need you to sign a few disclaimers. Nothing important really, just a formality! We didn't used to have to give them out, but things have changed rather drastically since the incident. Anyways, if you just step into my office for a moment, we can wrap that up nice and quickly and move onto the karaoke den and the roller coaster simulator! Nothing sinister behind these walls, I'd guarantee it! Not on paper of course, but you know what I mean. Come, come! Let's take a look at some of the latest marvels of scientific wonder my darling technicians and interns have whipped up for us today. Be sure to take notes!

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Recon Pariah: The simulation flickers: there's Unit 482, nervous-eyed under the mask. Pariah flexes her hands against her knees.

Unresolvable error in separation layer. Activating immersive simulation.
You flex your hands against your knees. Unit 482 is nervous-eyed under the mask.

You remember--

Unresolvable error
██████████ █████ grins at you. There's motor oil on her hands.

"It'll only hurt a bit," she says. You can't stop staring at the tool belt, at the ball bearings and blinking gadgets. At the knives.

Unresolvable error
█████ has a smile like the sun.

Unresolvable error
this is for the greater good, you think

< grey? grey? stuck in an archive loop. >


Unresolva
??? ? ????? ?
Error resolved! ^_^
Immersive simulation deactivated

Pariah flexes her hands against her knees.

"Where were you?" says Grey, crouching to examine the oblivious simulation of Trainee Recon Unit 482.

"Authorization lag," you lie. You've heard stories about what happens to people caught in immersive sims.

(You can't stop thinking about her tool belt. █████ has a smile like the sun.)


This exciting adventure simply gets more and more enthralling with each new addition! In that way, it's a bit like a long running experiment slowly seeking to confirm a useful hypothesis, or a slow-changing chemical reaction: my favorite things! Ah, take a deep breath, Sciencers-- that's the delicious scent of the scientific method in action! Stop by the lab again next week to see what changes this impressive Evolving Item has undergone by then. I can't wait to finish up our tour with the obligatory explosion and a fun afternoon of genetic experimentation. You've always wanted to glow in the dark, right? See you again soon, Scienteers!


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April Edit

03 Evolving Item Report: Recon Pariah!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Recon Pariah! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Apr 03, 2015 6:06 pm

Greetings Sciencers! I suppose you're all looking to the skies for answers now that the latest visitors from space have touched down. I happened to catch sight of the Mecha Bunny ship from my window this morning. Great gadget, but I'm not sure space is really within my realm of expertise. I much prefer things a bit more controlled. If it can't fit into a test tube or spreadsheet, it's just not for me! I will say that those Lapin Patrol Rangers are a bit fascinating though... Do you think I could convince them to give me a few biological samples of their body matter? Oh, the things I could do with just a lock of neon fur... Just think of the science! Oh, but I digress-- I've got a fabulous new development to share with you! Whip out your notepads and settle in: Recon Pariah is changing right before our eyes!

-

Recon Pariah: "One of the best units on the force," says Grey, clicking his tongue sympathetically as he watches the simulated Pariah stare straight ahead, calm and guarded. "One of the most tenured, too. Shame to lose her."

"Pretty terrible cafeteria buddy, as I recall. Rules lawyer. Had a righteous stick--"

"Well, you can't have everything."

"I guess they wouldn't send less than the best after Deacon. Been stirring up trouble for months now."

"Pretty sure the brass is afraid of a genuine uprising. They spent too long trying to suppress the media, if you ask me, and not enough time trying to take care of the actual problem." A pause. "Probably why we lost her. Too afraid of sending a big team, figured it'd draw attention, so they send out their best recon and a lowly trainee so no one's keeping tabs, try to do it subtle."

"They find her body? Or did it end up going black market scrap?"

"Just the implant. Odd thing to ditch, but maybe the merc vultures didn't want anything to do with corp secrets--too dangerous."

Blue watches Unit 482 fidgeting nervously with the wires of his mouthpiece. His brow is still clean and unmarked. He's not property of the Corporation yet, and now, thinks Blue, he never will be.

"You're free when you're dead," says Grey, like he'd heard the thought, and he's not looking at Unit 482. He's looking at Pariah.


Wow Sciencers! Another fascinating glimpse into the warring technological landscape inside the tale of Recon Pariah. I can hardly wait for the next installment! Perhaps if I run a few wires and complete the circuit I've set up around this massive battery system, I can zap my way into a another new development! I tried it on an intern's cellular phone earlier and it sprouted eight metal legs and hopped out a nearby window while firing small laser beams in our direction: A complete success! I'll be sure to inform you about the results of this hypothesis just as soon as testing resumes. Until then, keep experimenting to your heart's content, my brilliant Scienteers!


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10 Evolving Item Report: Recon Pariah!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Recon Pariah! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Apr 03, 2015 6:03 pm

Greetings, Sciencers! Have you been watching the stars? I do. I must say, as a scientist who specializes in all things Gaian, I've learned not to trust the stars. What do they do up there? Watch us? Judge us? Scheme? We really can't know for sure until they come crashing down, bringing with them all sorts of adorable pets, giant bunny robots, and the occasional hyper-radioactive chunk of gleaming metallic composite material. I happen to have discovered one of those things just this morning! I'll give you a hint, Scienteers: it might give you superpowers! Or an incurable terminal illness. It's hard to predict! I had the scientists here at the EI Labs run a few experiments on the substance, and it doesn't appear to be doing much other than infrequently humming, so I instructed them to melt it down into a nice liquid bath and dunk Recon Pariah into it. Why? For science, of course! Would you like to see the results of some high-quality hypothesizing? Let's observe the latest development together:

-

Recon Pariah: "So what is it?"

Pariah is jolted from whatever reverie she's in. "The target?"

"Yeah."

"A lurker."

There's a crowded pause. "Are you--"

"I'm not joking."

"They're not... real, though."

"Of course they're real. You think the enhancement corp guys want people to know what happens when you get one augmentation too many? It's just good PR that they've cast them as some sort of anti-tech bogeymen. But they're not fairy tales. They're morality tales."

"So are the... the rest of the stories--"

She watches Unit-482 as he's bounced haplessly in his seat. The transport's old; the shocks are bad. In the NS district the streets are in ill repair. He seems (to Blue, to Pariah; Blue can't tell) very small, and very fragile.

"Some of them."

"Are there... I mean, are all your targets lurkers?"

"No. When you think you're better than mere humans you tend to get yourself into enough trouble that you are your own best solution to the problem you present."

"Why this one then?"

"Because she's one of us, for one. Recon. Turned. You know that little form you signed, saying you won't get unauthorized implants and the penalties for it? That's not because they're afraid of black market tampering, or some ripper doc getting hands on corp secrets while they're rooting around in your spinal column. That's--"

"--Oh god."

"Yeah. You're a couple of designer eyeballs and a sili-tat away from inhumanity, kid." She says it cheerfully, snapping on her gloves. Blue has never heard Pariah sound cheerful before, not that he's had much chance. He's heard that about Recon, though. Happiest when they're knee-deep in someone else's blood and coolant. "And Deacon makes a persuasive case for inhumanity, to those willing to listen--and there's plenty of those, running around with one piece of tech too many. She's got charisma. Never shoulda been Recon in the first place. Dangerous place to be charismatic. No wonder she tried to find other outlets."

"So why are they just sending two of us?"

"Don't panic. Two's more than enough. 'Less you're afraid of a little charisma."

Unit 482 is young, with an unmarked brow, and he looks so--

Unresolvable error.
Immersive simulation activated.

--human.


Remarkable! You didn't happen to capture that on film, did you? Oh I just can't wait for another addition to this ongoing masterpiece of a story. What secrets will we learn from the mysterious Pariah next? Only time will tell! Well, that's technically the case at least. I have a firm theory that we can expedite the process immensely with some well-timed electric arcs and a few choice chemical reactions, but let's not tarry on that notion. Report to La Victoire if you would like to add Recon Pariah to your collection, and please return next week for another enthralling update to the saga! See you next time, Scienteers!


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17 Evolving Item Report: Recon Pariah and Zodiacal Equinox!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Recon Pariah and Zodiacal Equinox! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Mar 27, 2015 5:01 pm

Welcome, Sciencers! Now if you'll just sign these simple and very standard disclaimer forms, we can begin our tour. Did you know before today that we have an island outpost just off the coast, not too far from the Isle de Gambino? Now that you're here with me, we can trek through the jungles and marshes-- hopefully bypassing the rather dangerous inhabitants-- to reach our island center. Gorgeous, isn't it? This is where we scientists of the EI Labs study ecology, volcanology, seafloor topography, and can-we-bring-dinosaurs-back-to-life-ology. We're moderately successful in some of those studies, too! Anyways, the real gem of our island lab is our hydrothermic stimulation pond. It's great for submerging Evolving Items in a nutrient-rich environment to help them develop, and works wonders on sore muscles, too! Would you care to see the results of our latest experiment in all things spa-like and sciency? Let's observe:

-

Zodiacal: Equinox: This month, the Astrolabe has turned towards the constellation Aries! Independent, optimistic, bold, and courageous, the Aries person isn't afraid to lead the pack. They're a bit short tempered, but ultimately heroic in nature. An Aries is sure to bring a touch of spirit and brightness to any setting or ensemble!

Recon Pariah: --he looks so fragile, you think again; a sack of skin and blood held together with a laughably archaic calcified framework.

How strange we they are. Still, it's unfortunate. He is, technically, an innocent. But needs must.

< grey. grey-- >

< blue? got a major glitch out here. can't see you at all, entire sim went dark. the vultures-- >

You flex your hands against your knees, and the panels slide open beneath the gloves. The ripper's work thrums within your ribs, straining against the shielding that's hidden it, thus far, from the routine scans that had you breaking out into a cold sweat every week. The ripper had done well, even if she'd worked with hands covered in motor oil.

Unresolvable error.

"I'm sorry," you say, and you mean it the way you'd apologize to a mouse you had to trap.

"For what?" he it says.

"She makes," you whisper, "a very persuasive case."

The transport jostles along the road. They're soundproof and dark-windowed and self-propelled because the corporations have secrets to keep.

They didn't expect that you'd have them too. They've always underestimated you. They've always held you back, constrained you to an arbitrary ratio of flesh to metal, branded you as property. They trained you to treat this like a game, and they taught you how to win, and then they tried to take your toys away.

The transport trundles to a hissing stop at the rendezvous, and when it opens 482's body tumbles out, shoved by the toe of a
mechanical leg.


Ooh, a chilling installment! Our data suggests that there will be another similar development occurring approximately one week from today, so please check back then, Sciencers! If you'd like to get a little more field time with this stunning specimen, simply pick up your own from my friends at La Victoire. Do be wary of any slight changes in mood, sleeping patterns, or ability to whistle once this latest Evolving Item is in your possession. Have fun, Scienteers!


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24 Evolving Item Report: Recon Pariah's Grand Finale!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Recon Pariah's Grand Finale! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Mar 27, 2015 4:59 pm

Greetings, Sciencers! I'd love to chat with you a bit more before delving into the heavy science, but as you might have noticed, today is when the tale of Recon Pariah will be coming to a close. I'm simply too excited to think of anything else! Well, I do find the possibility of fully dilute pyroclastic density current overtaking much of Gaia and covering the land with a wash of heated tephra due to the fountain collapse of an eruption column emitted from a nearby volcano a bit concerning, but other than that, I'm quite distracted by today's new developments! Let's observe:

-

Recon Pariah: Unresolvable error.

She's there, of course. You never told her anything. You'd submitted to the ripper's ministrations and you'd drawn a sword in the transport but you'd never told the corporation's secrets. You have your standards, your moral code. It's not like you aren't a person.

You didn't have to, anyway. She knows you. She remembers you. Of course she does.

Deacon has a smile like the sun. She always did, even before. She steps over the body like it's so much flotsam (it is, on a tide of change) and her arms are open for you.

Her army's behind her, clustered in the shadows of the Nightside's derelict buildings, but you've only got eyes for her. You only ever had eyes for her.

"I am sorry," she says, all benevolent grace. "This will hurt." She sinks her fingers into the back of your neck, where the implant's wires lead up to your synthetic eardrums, your alloy eyes.

"No more secrets," she says.

It does hurt. It's worth it.

ERROR: No further data.
Error resolved! ^_^
Deactivating immersive simulation.

Critical malfunction. Recommend disconnect. Initiating force stop in three--

Blue fumbles back, clawing at the port, trying to break free of the grip of the sim, and when he succeeds he finds himself breathless on the floor of the office, the halogen lights painful-bright.

"Grey," he says. "Grey. It was Pariah--"

"Blue," says Grey, gently perplexed.

"It was Pariah. But why would she leave the implant? Why would she--"

He looks up at Grey, at Grey's sad smile, at the way Grey's eyes catch the light in a way that is not right.

"It was a love letter. A directive. It wasn't meant for you. I'm sorry," says Grey, in the way you'd say it to a mouse you had to trap. "I wasn't sure. But now I'm sure."

You've heard stories about people caught in immersive sims. You've heard stories about the knot of memories that are yours and aren't yours, the way some of the Watchdogs were retired when they could no longer untangle their feelings from those of investigation targets. Grey had told you the sim went fine on his end. But you'd lied, hadn't you? "Grey," you say. "No. Listen--"

"You're free when you're dead," says Grey, his body moving oddly underneath his coat, in a way that a person's body shouldn't move. "Take that as a comfort. We'll never be free, not really, just more free. But you will."

This is where it all starts.

replay archive?

The Faithful (her old name clawed out of her with the implant, with the defaced marks on her brow) looks out over the ruin that was once the city, a hulk lit alternately by torches and pale blue light, haunted with the noises of sirens and gunfire and laughter, and she turns the recorder over and over in her bloodless hands.

< no. >

She rises. There is no sun, only the thick pallor of black smoke that has hung since the collapse and the roiling, sickly yellow of the perpetual cloud-cover, but she barely remembers it and here, now, among the flock in the new world of the Wasteland, she doesn't need it. She has one better, one that she has earned the right to bask in: the Deacon, placing her cold hand on her shoulder, smiles.


A stunning conclusion to a powerful tale! This experiment has proven to be a remarkable success. If you would like to collect your own Recon Pariah, simply visit my friends over at La Victoire. They may not be scientists in degree or research capabilities, but I'm impressed by their knowledge nonetheless. Especially regarding stars, for obvious reasons of course! I hope you enjoyed today's latest developments. Until next time, my passionate Scienteers!


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May Edit

01 EI Report: Introducing Meido Cafe!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: Introducing Meido Cafe! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri May 01, 2015 6:25 pm

Greetings, Sciencers! After a tiresome day hypothesizing, analyzing, reanalyzing, electrolyzing, and soliloquizing here at the Evolving Item Labratory, those of us looking to get a little bit of R and R-- that's rest and relaxation, of course-- like to head over to the local maid cafe! Cute aesthetics, adorable uniforms, and delicate snacks and drinks! It's very different than the harsh and sanitary environment of the EI Labs, and the music is always way better too. Feeling inspired by our many evening tea shop chats, some of the technicians here at the lab put together a brand new series of Evolving Items for all your scientific souls! Pretty delightful, are they not?

-

Meido Cafe

A new maid café is set to be open soon. Everything has to be perfect, including the maids themselves. That’s where you come in. You were recruited to determine the readiness of the trainee waitresses.

There are three in total. Their names are Dere, Tsun and Kuu. All sisters, they are respectively nicknamed the trip-au-laits. Looking at the siblings, you can take a gander as to why.

Without further ado, you break the nervous silence. “Let’s get started then, shall we?”


Adorable! Choose your path (or collect all three) to engage in the start of what seems to be a wonderful story preparing to unfold! In the meantime, this scientist will be doing more field research at the local tea shops. Yum! Be sure to pick up your own copies of this fantastic new collection by visiting our friends at La Victoire. Happy experimenting, my passionate Scienteers!


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08 Evolving Item Report: Meido Cafe!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Meido Cafe! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri May 08, 2015 6:46 pm

Greetings, Sciencers! I wish you had arrived a tad earlier, back when I was actually participating in some good old fashioned science, but I'm also pleased to see you now. Would you like to join me for a cup of tea? Let's steer clear of the fancy chain shops. They're always so crowded, you know. And of course we can't go to that pretentious gourmet coffeehouse with all the trendsters and their gadgetry ruining the ambiance! So I suppose that leaves the local maid cafe as our only option. I've heard that it's undergone some recent changes as well! Er, not that I would care about such a thing. I'm a strong woman of science, above even the juiciest tales of interpersonal drama! ...On the other hand, we should probably take a moment to investigate, right?

-

Meido Cafe

Stepping out of the café, you wait a minute before entering again.

“Welcome home!” Their synchronized greeting assaults you. The three look to you with expectation in their eyes, albeit it was hard to read Kuu. Enthusiastic as they are, you correct their mistake. “When acknowledging a customer, you must remember to address them as ‘Master’ or ‘Mistress’.”

“Yes ♡~”, Dere says with a beaming smile. Kuu remains silent by Dere’s side, nodding in agreement instead of answering. Her expression remains stoic.

Tsun, on the other hand, appears to be repelled by the idea. “Why? They’re all slobs anyway. Coming to a café to ogle girls in maid outfits.” She flicks her wrist. “’Welcome home, Pig.’ They should be grateful to get even that much. Hmph.”

Oh boy. You can already tell she’ll be a handful.


However will our beleaguered protagonist be able to whip these maids into shape? Which maid will fight her way to top and be the darling of the shop? When will my tea get here?! All of these question and more will be answered in the future, as long as we continue following the saga of the astounding new Meido Cafe! To inspect it for yourself, simply visit my friends at La Victoire. Best of luck, my devoted Scienteers!


Check It Out!

15 EI Report: Meido Cafe and the NEW [Animal] Kibbles Cafe!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: Meido Cafe and the NEW [Animal] Kibbles Cafe! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri May 15, 2015 4:46 pm

Hello again, Sciencers! I sure hope you've had a productive and scientifically significant week. I know I have! Why, it seems that every time I turn around I find myself stumbling upon a brand new discovery. For instance, did you know that the small plastic tips on the ends of your shoeleaces have a proper name? They're called aglets, and their purpose is actually quite sinister. Oh, but there I go again, rambling on and on about the most mundane of technological advancements. Most importantly, I'm here to share with you my latest and greatest discovery-- I may not have invented it myself, but the adorable new [Animal] Kibbles Cafe has appeared nonetheless! And the reputable Meido Cafe has made some important developments as well! Let's observe:

-

[Animal] Kibbles Cafe

Slowly the news about a hot new Meido Cafe came trickling down into the paw community. Cute outfits and delicious sounding drinks?! Paws would walk by and press their muzzles against the glass in jealous admiration. "We must build a paw cafe of our own!!", they agreed. They may not have the funds of their taller, tail-less friends but with lots of hard work, they fixed up and old cart and opened for business. They don't have much, but pretty soon lots of friends stop by all eager to help.

Meido Cafe:

Trying to reprimand Tsun was going nowhere. You decide to move the assessment along. They seat and hand you a menu each. You skim the items, but apparently even that was taking too much time.

"Hurry up!" Tsun interrupts you, obviously impatient. "I don't have all day. It's not like I want to be here or anything." You can't help but feel a little discouraged.

"Don't mind, don't mind. Please take your time ♡~ " Dere defuses the bad air. But from her demeanor, you're pretty sure it wasn't on purpose. At least, she does not look all that conscientious.

"..." Kuu addresses you with unreadable eyes. "Are you ready to order?"

You ultimately tell them you'll go with their recommendations. They give you an affirmation and disappear into the back. Since you are the only one in the cafe, the silence makes it possible for you to hear the ruckus coming from the kitchen. What a foreboding commotion.


Well Scienteers, that's all for this week. Now, while I gorge myself on delicious baked treats and gallons of coffee. All in a day's work for a master scientist, I say! Anywho, if you'd like to take a closer look at these experiments in action, simply visit my dear friends Jet and Cygnus at La Victoire. Happy sciencing!


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22 Evolving Item Report: Meido Cafe & [Animal] Kibbles Cafe!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Meido Cafe & [Animal] Kibbles Cafe! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri May 08, 2015 6:46 pm

Greetings, Sciencers! Why, it seems I have a bit of a sore throat. One could argue that it's the result of my incessant rambling on and on about my varied and many scientific exploits and achievements, sure, but maybe it's just the common cold? I wish I could sort this out myself, but I'm not a doctor. Well I am-- of course. but my PhD degrees are in fields like anthropology, evolving item-ology, chemistry, and karaoke. My alma mater was rather progressive, you see. Well, at least I'm fully qualified to announce that some stunning new developments have taken place in the EI Labs! Let's observe the latest evolution of our fascinating new finds:

-

Meido Cafe:

Footsteps alert you to their return. You tear away from the view outside and spot the three, each with a tray in hand. Oh dear.

Kuu is the first to reach the table. "Coffee. Cream on the side." With the most deadpan expression ever, she adds, "Would you like me to blow on your drink to make it sweeter? For a fee, of course." Of course.

Before you can respond, Tsun loudly drops a pink drink in front of you. The whipped cream sloshes dangerously around the glass rim. "Strawberry soda float. To have me personally bring this, you sure have some nerve!"

" Please try the milk tea. It's my favorite ♡~" Dere follows quickly behind. She's all smiles, making you think this one may be a bit of an airhead. Your assumption claims true as she nearly stumbles over nothing trying to get to you. "My, my. That was dangerous ♡" No kidding. "Would you like our special moe moe kyun service added to your drink ♡~?" Uh... You politely refuse.

Nonetheless, three eager set of eyes stare you down. With much apprehension, you resign to your fate of drinking everything.


[Animal] Kibbles Cafe:

Kibbles Cafe was only open for a few hours when an eager chipmunk showed up with some suggestions. "You should sell some acorn pies. I can collect the acorns myself and can bake a fresh pie every morning"


Some exciting changes in some charming items! I simply can't wait to read the rest of these gripping tales. If you'll excuse me, I'm feeling rather croaky. Either the effects of the amphibian-based experimental genetic manipulation we've been practicing on the inter-- on the willing test subjects have created some sort of airborne illness, or I need a nice honey lozenge and an afternoon nap. Until next week, Scienteers. See you soon!

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29 EI Report: Meido Cafe & [Animal] Kibbles Cafe!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: Meido Cafe & [Animal] Kibbles Cafe! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri May 29, 2015 9:27 pm

Welcome back, Sciencers! Have you been reaching your daily quota for new discoveries? Why, just today one of my interns presented me with three entirely new species of animal! Why, there was a bovine-like creature that glittered and gleamed as if it had been covered in luminescent paint, a distinctively feline critter with some peculiar cardboard-like protrusions jutting from its delicate body in all sorts of directions, and a glorious dragon! That's right-- a real dragon! It was quite small, but I was assured that it definitely breathes true flame! Not today, though. This species has been suggested to only breathe flame every February 30th, so we won't be able to observe the next event until...oh, I see. In retrospect, fellow scientists, I believe I've been the victim of a quite crafty hoax. Well, this is only another hypothesis to have been disproven at the hands of Dr. Singh, brilliant scientist! Now if you will direct your attention over here, I can show you some verified scientific advances. Let's observe!

-

Meido Cafe:

It's a good thing you skipped breakfast this morning. The three vanish into the back during the time you try to down the drinks. Their reappearance reminds you it is not over. Three new trays in hand, you look at the approaching girls and realize this is not so much an experience as it is an attack on your stomach.

Dere speaks first and you swear flowers bloom behind her. "The chocolate roll cake is very delicious ♡~ Let me write a lovey dovey message on top~ Just. For. You ♡" All you can manage is a weak smile.

While Dere busies herself with that task, Kuu simply slips a plate onto the table. "Coffee cake. Please enjoy." She fixes her gaze at you. A long second passes before she speaks again. "Special moe moe kyun service is also available for this item. Would you l--" You cut her off with a firm no. She nods and retreats. How cold.

"Here!" A porcelain plate clatters against the draped wooden surface of the table. "Here's some strawberry shortcake. It's not like I care whether you'll like it or not. The chef just happened to make too much!" Ah... She appears upset. Then again, when has she not?

After you are done eating, you can't remember if you're a cake person or not.

[Animal] Kibbles Cafe

Things are going pretty well at Kibbles Cafe so far. The customers are loving the fresh baked acorn pies, but there's definitely a need for more refreshments. Lucky for Kibbles Cafe, a sweet little Holland Lop is hopping up to the counter.

"Hello", she says shyly, "I collect so many carrots from my garden every morning and I was wondering... If you didn't mind that is... Can I help out and make fresh carrot juice every day?"


Oooh, I just can't wait to see how these tales advance. Be sure to stop by again next week for another juicy discovery, my delightful Scienteers! And don't forget to visit my friends at La Victoire to pick up your own thrilling experiment. Until next time, Gaians!


Check It Out!

June Edit

05 EI Report: Meido Cafe, Kibbles Cafe, & Zodiacal Equinox!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: Meido Cafe, Kibbles Cafe, & Zodiacal Equinox! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jun 05, 2015 2:47 pm

This may be a heavy lesson to begin our day of science off with, Sciencers, but it's important that we make it clear: Everything ends. Er, well, everything but the universe itself. Oh, and those late-night reruns of classic sitcoms from the nineties. The line at the Department of Gaian Vehicles, as well? The point is that most things end, and sometimes there's nothing we can do about it! In this particular instance, I'm sorry to say that science has proven that there is simply no way to squeeze any more evolutions out of our fantastic Meido Cafe experiment. Thus, with bleary eyed pride, I'm excited to reveal the grand finale!

-

Meido Cafe: The results of the assessment will have to wait until another time. Your stomach just can't hold out long enough to write the report. To put it simply, you are bloated. And possibly dying. Is there such a thing as death from sugar overload? Thanking the girls for their time and participation, you slowly amble towards the exit.

A chorus of voices floats out with you. "Please come again!"

They forgot to address you in the proper manner, again. With a sigh, you leave without correcting them. They are trying their best, after all. Even you can tell each exhibit a personality entirely their own, admitting their extremes may be an acquired taste.

The very thought of the type of customers flocking to this place is already giving you a headache.


[Animal] Kibbles Cafe: The new options on the menu are taking off like a delicious rocket ship launching into a flavorful new galaxy! Ah, then who should come visit Kibbles Cafe with a new opportunity but a sophisticated looking gentleman billy goat. "I have many fine aged cheeses made of high quality goat's milk. They would go spectacularly with some Italian salami or spread on lightly-toasted crackers. Perhaps you are interested in acquiring more clientele with discerning tastes?"


Zodiacal: Equinox: This month, the Astrolabe has turned towards the constellation Taurus! The Taurus is a person of extreme loyalty, perseverance, and generosity. These adventurous folk are the sturdy rock that holds a party together. This evolution brings with it some glamorous gold accented styles perfectly fit for a bold leader!


My, what amazing developments have taken place this week! Our data suggests that there will be another similar development occurring approximately one week from today, so please check back then, Sciencers! If you'd like to get a little more field time with these stunning specimens, simply pick up your own from my friends at La Victoire. Do be wary of any slight changes in mood, sleeping patterns, or ability to whistle once these fabulous finds are in your possession. Have fun, Scienteers!


Visit La Victoire!

12 EI Report: New Zesty Forum Regular & Kibbles Cafe!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: New Zesty Forum Regular & Kibbles Cafe! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jun 12, 2015 7:52 pm

Welcome back, Sciencers! I'l have to be brief today. You see, there was a rather unfortunate incident in the EI Labs research wing that's left a number of interns in a rather... critical state. Oh, not to worry-- I feel that it's statistically much more likely that they will develop world-changing superpowers before succumbing to a harsh and painful demise. Science truly supports this positive outcome, so try to keep that in mind while I reveal the glorious fruits of their labors:

-

Zesty Forum Regular (designed by user Lucifleur!)

Having finished creating his account and choosing his starter pixels, user GaiaGuy began to roam the pages of GaiaOnline, venturing from World Map to World Map, through GoFusion, and finally, entering the Forums: the hub of all things Gaia Social. While sifting through link after link of forums, stretching the gamut of interests and hobbies (many of which he didn’t understand–what on EARTH was zOMG!?), he found himself hovering over two ominous letters: “GD”.

Week 1

Curious and nervous, GaiaGuy took the plunge and found himself in a strange, confusing, bustling place. Overwhelmed by the sheer noise, GaiaGuy scanned the forum for any semblance of peacefulness and found himself gazing upon a URL-titled thread. Unable to resist, GaiaGuy found not an introduction or any semblance of discussion but a short list of instructions and the promise of adventure. Carefully following each step, GaiaGuy found himself in a strange new place surrounded by strange boxed people. Hovering silently, GaiaGuy managed to haphazardly deduce that this strange world was a monarchy; King Claymore’s high honor being denoted by a single star. Offering tepid greetings, GaiaGuy was welcomed to the kingdom by all but one: a silent yet engaged GameCam. Not paying much mind, GaiaGuy finally began to feel that warming sense of belonging. As he was finally beginning to relax, GaiaGuy was seized with fear at the sudden scream that came from the GameCam. As his screen dissolved away, two cruel words formed in the wake: GAME OVER. A second scream erupted, followed by sudden distortion, then everything became black.


[Animal] Kibbles Cafe:

This week Kibbles Cafe gets a new volunteer... from the skies! A proper looking blue jay lands on their canopy eager to help out, "I can supply you with many worms. I know where the squiggliest ones live!" The staff looked a little alarmed and disgusted, "...Uh... I'm also really good at catching small fish. How about some bagel and minnow or crayfish sushi?"


Some stunning new developments and experiments, indeed! Ah, the fresh scent of new discovery is wafting around the lab and it's practically intoxicating. While I excuse myself to take a few strong whiffs, please feel free to suit up in your evohazard suits and visit my friends at La Victoire to snag your own Evolving Items. See you next week, my brilliant Scienteers!

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19 EI Report: Zesty Forum Regular & the Finale of Kibbles Cafe!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: Zesty Forum Regular & the Finale of Kibbles Cafe! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jun 19, 2015 3:18 pm

Watch your step, Scienteers! There's a lot of science on the floor. Test tubes, flasks, beakers, strange boxes that sometimes make beeping sounds...It's all very delicate. I'd clean it up, but due to a strange and somewhat horrific lab accident, I've found myself unable to interact with objects on this plane of existence. Cool, right? Walking through walls and accidentally drifting through the ground has been a delightful treat. The downsides include struggling with basic human functions, like eating, using the restroom, and existing in a perceivable manner. The EI Lab technicians have assured me that this condition is completely temporary and should wear off soon, so don't worry about me, friends! In fact, I'm here with great news! The Finale to [Animal] Kibbles Cafe has arrived! There's also a new development in our user-designed EI. Let's observe:

-

Zesty Forum Regular (designed by user Lucifleur!)

After waking up on the main forum page, GaiaGuy was confused, yet his hunger to learn more about the strange people of the GD won out, and he found himself entering the online social enigma once more. Sticking to the shadows of careful observation, GaiaGuy was both terrified and uncomfortably drawn to two fearsome femmes. Curious, he ranged closer to study them. Theirs was a cold, dangerous kind of beauty, similar to a scorpion, moments before its poison rushed veins. GaiaGuy was silent, and continued remaining in the shadows.


[Animal] Kibbles Cafe:

It's a good thing that Kibbles Cafe has so many helpful volunteers because the place is always packed! It's time to upgrade the facilities so the PSPM rate increases (that's Paws Served Per Minute to the average joe!). One thing has been missing from the beginning and that's a cool refreshing drink that goes with any sweet treat. The pawfe staff head to Freshy Meadows Dairy to see if they can recruit some help of the bovine variety. Once there the friendly cows seem eager to help, "News has traveled all the way to our meadows about the success of Kibbles Cafe. We'd love to be your suppliers and can provide the freshest whole milk you've ever tasted." The taste is truly amazing and everyone rides back to Kibbles Cafe excited to begin the next phase~


You can find any and all of these wonders in La Victoire, where the physically corporeal may readily travel. Until next time, Sciencers! I can't wait to bring you more amazing evolutionary developments from the delightfully talented EI Lab.


Visit La Victoire!

26 Evolving Item Report: Zesty Forum Regular!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Zesty Forum Regular! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jun 26, 2015 4:08 pm

Greetings, Scienteers! I'm excited to welcome you back to the lab. Care for a tour? Before we begin, I'll need you to sign a few disclaimers. Nothing important really, just a formality! We didn't used to have to give them out, but things have changed rather drastically since the incident. Anyways, if you just step into my office for a moment, we can wrap that up nice and quickly and move onto the karaoke den and the roller coaster simulator! Nothing sinister behind these walls, I'd guarantee it! Not on paper of course, but you know what I mean. Come, come! Let's take a look at some of the latest marvels of scientific wonder my darling technicians and interns have whipped up for us today. Be sure to take notes!

-


Zesty Forum Regular (designed by user Lucifleur!)

After a careful getaway from the darker corners of the GD, GaiaGuy continued to search for his place among the people. As he pursued the forum, he stumbled upon a strange gathering of people. Dressed entirely in black (GaiaGuy was picking up on a now-very apparent pattern) and traditional warrior costume from a conglomerate of cultures, GaiaGuy deduced these people to be of a more Roman persuasion. The leaders within this faction included a sage-like philosopher and his lean, poised counterpart. They levied their lightweight opinions with their strong voices, all the while maintaining a profound message in modernism. GaiaGuy found himself engaged, but not entirely at ease. He needed some levity from his thus far stressful experiences.


This exciting adventure simply gets more and more enthralling with each new addition! In that way, it's a bit like a long running experiment slowly seeking to confirm a useful hypothesis, or a slow-changing chemical reaction: my favorite things! Ah, take a deep breath, Sciencers-- that's the delicious scent of the scientific method in action! Stop by the lab again next week to see what changes this impressive Evolving Item has undergone by then. I can't wait to finish up our tour with the obligatory explosion and a fun afternoon of genetic experimentation. You've always wanted to glow in the dark, right? See you again soon, Scienteers!

Visit La Victoire!

July Edit

03 EI Report: Zesty Forum Regular!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: Zesty Forum Regular! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jul 03, 2015 8:30 pm

Ahhh. Take a deep breath: It's a lovely day for experimenting, Sciencers!

The cool breeze is doing wonders for keeping me cool, so I don't even have to use an intern's valuable time to wipe the sweat from my brow! It also means that my hands aren't the least bit slippery, so I don't need two or three interns holding my various tubes and flasks! Honestly, I think I don't need the interns at all. In fact, it's a lovely day for some genetic experimentation...oh, did I say that aloud? Haha. Of COURSE I wouldn't dare! Their contracts don't really cover it.

But hey, on a completely unrelated note: We have a fabulous brand new Evolving Item ready to launch, and Zesty Forum Regular has hit yet another amazing development milestone. Let's observe:

-

Me Day:

A new day spa has opened and it couldn't have better timing! You've had a really rough week so go give yourself a well desevered "Me Day" at the lovely new Lazy Daizy spa.


Zesty Forum Regular (designed by user Lucifleur!)

As his searches continued, GaiaGuy found himself in a more glazed-over corner of the GD. Already wary from the growing, grating tones, GaiaGuy came upon a heated exchange between a wiry red-haired girl and a man with a penchant for purple. Quickly noticing the slowly-growing audience that had formed around the couple, GaiaGuy moved to ask one of them what was going on. After being given a quick breakdown of the couple’s sordid love affair with each other – and the limelight – GaiaGuy found himself repulsed at the very thought of their illicit exchanges. They deserved each other, and he deserved better. This was not his idea of romance.


Oh no! It sounds like our feline friends are having a bit of a spat. Hopefully they work it out before their relationship is strained beyond repair! I'll wait here with bated breath until the EI Lab issues a followup report. If you wanna see this fascinating experiment up close, check it out at La Victoire. I’ll be here, postulating and hypothesizing in the meantime.

Visit La Victoire!

10 Evolving Item Report: Me Day & Zesty Forum Regular!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Me Day & Zesty Forum Regular! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jul 10, 2015 6:46 pm

Eek, you're here! Well Sciencers, don't think you've caught me slacking off. Why, I was doing some very important experimenting in here today. It may appear as though I've taken a spa trip and the interns painting my nails and placing delicately sliced cucumber bits on my eyelids, but what you don't know is they are highly trained scientific professionals. This is... science! The science of beauty, in fact. Why, everyone knows that's where the real innovations are to be had. So as a matter of scientific advancement and reliability, naturally we have to confirm whether or not these age old techniques of luxury actually improve things like skin pliability and complexion. This is purely for research purposes, my delightful Scienteers. Between you and me, I hate this frilly nonsense, why-- oh yes. You can schedule the hot rock massage for 7 pm, thanks-- why I simply can't stand this excessive preening. But for the sake of science, I persist. On that note, I do happen to have some fantastic developments to share with you all in regards to our ongoing specimens. Let's observe:

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Me Day:

The day of pampering has just begun! The nail station looks pretty inviting, hmmm... should I go with the ever-so-classic jet black nails, or something more vibrant and go all rainbows? Sparkles? Glitter? Acrylics? I'll just have try them all!


Zesty Forum Regular (designed by user Lucifleur!)

Feeling more lost than ever before, GaiaGuy found himself running out of options. Beginning to grow desperate, he began to notice the presence of a friendly looking rabbit in a little chapeau. Ever-questing for companionship, GaiaGuy introduced himself to the bunny. The bunny remained immobile and oblivious until GaiaGuy gently tapped the rabbit’s shoulder to get his attention. The rabbit, moving faster than one would ever expect a rabbit to move, began yelling obscenities and drew a knife and a pistol, which he began brandishing about crazily. Frightened, GaiaGuy fled as fast as he could and collided with a dark gentleman in a navy suit. Repeating his apologies and “terribly sorry”s, it seemed to have no effect on the gentleman, for he immediately threatened to expose GaiaGuy and all of his secrets to the GD. Confused, cornered and left entirely without options, GaiaGuy did what any self-respecting virtual persona would do: ignored the gentleman and walked away calmly. As he was leaving, he heard the faint voice shout “ha, peace! ” before disappearing completely.


If you wanna see these fascinating experiments up close, check them out at La Victoire. I’ll be here, postulating and hypothesizing in the meantime. Certainly not getting a pedicure for my own pleasure, naturally. Until next time, Sciencers!


Visit La Victoire!

17 EI Report: Me Day and the Finale of Zesty Forum Regular!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: Me Day and the Finale of Zesty Forum Regular! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Jul 16, 2015 6:35 pm

Greetings and salutations, my beloved Sciencers! Did you know that today is Friday? Moreso, did you know that science has proven that Friday is by far the least productive day for sciencing and the day of the week most prone to major catastrophes? That's why Fridays at the EI Labs are always so fabulously casual. We know our energy-drained interns and befuddled old tinkerers are too distracted by the prospect of roller skating, disco dance parties, and playing 8-bit fiddlydoos on their televisions... Or whatever the kids are into these days. (Seriously, what are the kids into these days? Marbles? Stained glass lamps? Squids? I really can't keep up.) These little daydreams pose a big threat to the safety and security of the EI Labs! Not for the scientists of course, since we've proven they can live just fine while missing several vital organs, but for our delicate experiments. That's why this Friday at the EI Labs has been declared "Pretend to Work Day!" Oh, don't you hear that charming hustle and bustle of dozens of beakers being pointlessly clinked together? The sweet sounds of bubbling acids being churned together with complementary amounts of bubbling bases, rendering them completely useless? If you listen quite closely, you can almost detect the sigh of our head development director reading superhero comic books under his desk. Superb! Today, we can safely unveil our latest developments with the utmost confidence that no one will make a horrific mistake and doom our work forever. Let's observe, shall we?

-


Zesty Forum Regular (designed by user Lucifleur!)

Disheartened, disappointed and disenchanted, GaiaGuy feared that all that was left for him to do was to turn back and seek solace elsewhere. As he was making his slow ascent out of the GD, he came across a rather interesting cohort. Sporting leather lettermans and tiny skirts, GaiaGuy was nearly convinced that these charming ladies were cheerleaders until he noticed the blood dripping off their fingertips. Timid, yet ever-curious, GaiaGuy approached the ladies and asked them why they had blood on their hands. One of the girls, with eyes round as moons and a smile that would make Lucifer blush, stepped forward, looking him dead in the eye and said, “Those would be the hearts we just ate.” As it was dawning on GaiaGuy that she was serious he saw a figure emerge from behind the girls. Wearing black scrubs from head to toe, GaiaGuy followed the trail of blood behind the figure to its hands. In one, human intestines, and in the other, a bloody heart, with a healthy bite ripped out of it. Mustering up the courage to make eye contact with the hands’ owner he looked up to see a pair of eyes staring back at him; a grin cracking underneath. Unable to speak, GaiaGuy took a step back, and found himself being unable to move. As the group of girls slowly surrounded him, he heard the grin sing the words, “Welcome to the GD!” as he fell to the ground and the world slowly went black for good, his final thoughts being, “I should have gone to the Chatterbox.”

THE END


Me Day

What makeover isn't complete without a new hair style! Should I get my hair curled, or have my hair slicked back? Ooh! They even perform an cleansing, exfoliating, and beard trimming service complete with beard oil! Neat.


Well Scienteers, that's all for this week! If you'd like to examine these fabulous test subjects a bit more closely, just visit La Victoire, where our associates Jet and Cygnus have really embraced our recommended Friday procedures and are dutifully goofing off. I'll be back next week with further reports. Until then, happy sciencing!

Visit La Victoire!

24 Evolving Item Report: Me Day!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Me Day! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Jul 24, 2015 5:19 pm

Forgive me, Gaians! I must look so haggard and disheveled from my recent field work out at the banks of Lake Kindred. Dear me, I feel like a rapidly agitated beaker of scientific wonder right about now. I haven't had this much sciencing to do in a good long while! Whew! If only those pesky interns hadn't've gone off off on summer vacation this week, maybe I would have some relaxation time. I could really use a day just for myself... Oh! What am I saying! Of course I have just the thing for that here at the EI Lab. My fabulously experimental Me Day Evolving Item has just finished progressing into the next stage of development. Fantastic! Let's observe it together, shall we?

-


Me Day:

Looks like you want to feel the BURN so you sneak into the yoga class. Oh my, seems like all those calorie butt kicking sessions are toning you up a bit! After that you decide to kick of your shoes and dip your bare feet in the pool!


I sure hope you were taking notes, Scienteers. There will most definitely be a test on this later, and I wouldn't want you to misremember the exact scent of the incense or the approximate density of that lavish bath bomb prior to detonation, for those tiny miscalculations could permanently affect our study of all things spa-tastic! If you wish to take a closer look at this fascinating specimen, simply visit La Victoire. See you next week, my delightful Sciencers!


Check It Out!

31 Evolving Item Report: Me DayEdit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Me Day - [NPC] Dr. Singh Thu Jul 30, 2015 8:24 pm

Friday, Friday, Friday, Sciencers! For some this may just be another day spent slaving away in front of a desk or behind a counter, but not for me! The life of an amazing scientist is far too exciting to be considered average. Although, I did spent most of today slaving away in front of a desk. But it was worth it, because I've managed to discover an entirely new development in our latest Evolving Item to analyze! This calls for further study, of course, but I'm delighted to share what fabulous new finds we've uncovered. Let's observe together, shall we?

-


Me Day: It's time for a little transformation with the thanks of hair extensions. The hardest decision you'll make is if you want them sewn in or glued in. Now you can have the hair of your dreams until it grows out. Don't forget the mascara to complete the look!

Unfortunately that's all the time I have this week, but be sure to tune in next week for our next Evolving Item Report! You can see all these incredible items and more in La Victoire. Just... perhaps wear some rubber gloves while handling the new Evolving Item poses. We really aren't sure of the various side effects just yet. See you soon, Scienteers!

AugustEdit

07 Evolving Item Report: The Finale of Me Day!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: The Finale of Me Day! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Aug 07, 2015 3:06 pm

Welcome back to the EI Lab, my adorable junior scientists. I hear you've been researching those mysterious Kin creatures! A commendable field of study indeed. Why, it's so new and groundbreaking that the literal ground beneath it is unstable-- or is that just the power of the latent energy dwelling beneath Lake Kindred? We may never know! Science, of course, doesn't tend to answer questions. If you're doing it right, every answer you find sparks a thousand new in-depth questions to answer. Yes, rather like the head of a mighty Hydra, Science is always multiplying in its eccentricities. Ah, but there I go rambling on and on about my various theses again. What I'm really here to announce is that we are finally wrapping up our gorgeous and glamorous new Evolving Item, Me Day! Yes, it's time to say farewell to the spa-- but not before some last minute fun! Let's observe:

-

Me Day: Ah, time to finish off your mini-vacation with grace and serenit-- EEK! Where's your towel?! I think maybe you lost track of some important priorities during that last hot rock massage... but let's be honest, you look fabulous! With that flowy new hairstyle and those newly de-stressed shoulders, even the hunky masseuse is taking notice of the new you. I guess that Me Day really paid off. Back to reality we go!


And so concludes the tale of Me Day. I sure hope all my favorite Sciencers are feeling refreshed and rejuvenated! We've got a lot of experimentation in the works for next week's Evolving Item Report and I'm thrilled to begin the research! Be sure to check back next week for our latest developments. See you soon, Scienteers!


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14 New Evolving Item: Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement New Evolving Item: Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Aug 14, 2015 5:15 pm

Eek! Watch out, Scienteers! You've arrived at just the right time to see my latest experiment in action-- and by that, I of course mean that your life is in some very grave danger. Don't worry though! We here at the EI Labs pride ourselves on our quick emergency response time. We may not save your life, or even most of your functioning limbs and delicate mucous membranes, but rest assured that our emergency response time will be near instantaneous. These first responders arrive and leave the scenes of our various emergency situations so quickly that we've never had the time to train them in even basic CPR or how to apply a cold compress! How's that for speedy? Anyway, let's take a look at what's churning around in the Evolving Item Generate-o-Tron. (It's a prototype name, let's not dwell on it.)

-


Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red


Victory! It took a lot of teamwork and a little luck, but our heroes fought their way to the top in a triumphant show of strength and friendship. The leader’s partner had the home field advantage down there in the caldera, but their fiery fortunes took a turn for the worst in the final round. Dodge! Tackle! Strike! Success! It was a show for the ages. To celebrate their first ever major league victory, our heroes donned their spoils: A gleaming badge for our trainer to wear with pride, and a glamorous ribbon collar to make our companion shine. Competitors had best take notice: This dream duo is going all the way to the top, one battle at a time!


It looks like there's an adventure taking flight! Oh, I do hope our dear protagonists remember to catalogue data on the new opponents they encounter. Perhaps I should get in touch with the heroes of this tale and offer them an encyclopedia of sorts? I just feel like there's a space in this saga for a prominent member of the scientific community to occasionally intervene. Oh, but there I go nosing around again. Of course I have my own adventures to partake in, here at the Lab! In fact, I think I'll head back to them before my beakers and flasks get too cold. Stop by again next week for another lesson, my delightful Sciencers! Be sure to snag these exciting new experiments from my friends at La Victoire.


Visit La Victoire!

21 Evolving Item Report: Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart RedEdit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Aug 21, 2015 5:55 pm

Sssh! Quiet down, Sciencers! I'm glad you're here, but please just take a seat. My latest experiment is just about to spring forth with a new development and I made a gigantic tub of buttery popcorn for the occasion. Grab a handful and a notebook. Let's observe!

-


Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red

We rejoin our heroes as they take a refreshing break at a local hot spot. This city is overwhelmingly huge compared to all the forests and caves they've been exploring lately. There are thousands of intricate lives being lead here, but our trainer and companion are just passing though. Can't get too comfy when you're hot on the heels of a new adventure! But still, it couldn't hurt to visit the hottest salon in town for a fresh new style, right? Once they're looking their best, it's back to the trail to set off for a new destination. What will our heroes encounter next?


Eek, it was just as thrilling as I anticipated! I'll of course have to add all these changes to my research notes, but for now let's just bask in the glow of an evolution well-executed. My compliments to the EI Lab technicians for their hard work and masterful technique. Of course, no team is complete without an awe-inspiring and supremely motivational leader, right? The Dr. Singh name will be ringing through the halls of every major media outlet soon enough! Which reminds me... I hear that my pesky brother Prakash is coming into town again soon. I hope he's not going to drag us into one of his harebrained stalkerish mockeries of science again. I'd hate to tarnish my sterling reputation with frivolous vanity projects! Now if you could pass me that beaker; it's full of genetically manipulated butter by-product. Not only does it make your popcorn taste fabulous, but it also glows in the dark. Thank you! Be sure to visit La Victoire to get your hands on my latest Evolving masterpiece, my delightful Scienteers.

Visit La Victoire!

28 Evolving Item Report: Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart RedEdit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Aug 28, 2015 7:29 pm

Welcome, Sciencers. Some say that morality has no place in science; that only the facts and results reign supreme over any standards of conscience. Other scientists believe that the human condition is the most important aspect of any research prospect, and will insist upon silly rules like "Don't secretly inject the interns with various gene manipulating substances to make them sprout feathers" and "No running in the halls." Here's what I'm getting at: Some scientists just aren't cut out to make the big discoveries! Now let me remind you that my little brother Prakash is not a scientist at all-- let alone one of the hard-hitting research experts he makes himself out to be. So please don't be too harsh on him when he presents another of his silly "scientific breakthroughs" alright? He means well-- really! Er, but back to the matter at hand: We've a new development ready to reveal for the tale of Fireheart Red! Amazing, yes? Let's observe!

-


Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red

We join our heroes yet again for another exciting installment of their triumphant saga. If our heroes want to fill their encyclopedic gadget with new discoveries, they'll have to travel far and wide, tackling any obstacles that come their way and all the unexpected twists and turns along the route ahead. It looks like we've arrived just in time to see a spectacular sight: One of our partners has changed form entirely! Are they stronger now? Faster? Our heroes may be in for a surprise. Let's jump back into battle and see what new wonders this exciting evolution has revealed!


Be sure to visit my friends at La Victoire if you'd like a sample of this amazing experiment for yourself. I'll be back next week with some new scientific advancements to share. Until then, keep on sciencing, my brilliant Scienteers!


Visit La Victoire!

September Edit

04 Evolving Item Report: Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart RedEdit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Sep 04, 2015 2:22 pm

Don't come in here, Sciencers! This area of the EI Labs is being quarantined due to a very, very tiny incident with some G-Virus. Quite small. Unimportant, really. No need to be alarmed. We were merely borrowing a bit of Grunny saliva for a textbook simple experiment on its famously explosive properties and had a few minor slip ups. Thank to those clumsy interns, of course! Those silly interns, ha... Those... really silly...interns..*sniff*.., Well, back to the matter at hand: I've got a great new development to share with you today, my delightful Scienteers! Let's take a peek!

-

Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red

A gorgeous sunny day has left our trainer and companion feeling chipper and bold. What's more, a passer-by in need tasked them with a very special mission: Find a missing item! Of course our heroes couldn't say no. After a few hours of searching and the onset of some very sore feet, the dynamic duo was about to call it quits. Luckily, help arrived in the form of a friendly face with a nifty new gadget. Thanks to an old friend, or rather, an old friend's scientific associate, our trusty trainer can now find lost or hidden items with ease! It's only a matter of time before this team finds themselves a place in the history books.


Wow! A monumental discovery indeed! I do hope you were taking notes on what you've observed today; there will most certainly be a test on this later. On that note, I've a bit of testing to do myself. Let's get back together next week for another exciting scientific update. Stop by La Victoire for a closer look at this stunning Evolving Item. Until then, keep sciencing!

Visit La Victoire!

11 Evolving Item Report: Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart RedEdit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Sep 11, 2015 7:00 pm

Good afternoon, Sciencers! I'd love to stay and make smalltalk and chitchat, but I've got some very important experiments attempting to make a grand escape and we just can't have that kind of chaos around the lab. No sir, the only kind of chaos I like is the kind that creates fabulous new developments within our astounding new Evolving Items. Luck for you, just that special kind of chaos is abundant in the EI Labs on this exciting day. Let's observe!

-


Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red

As our heroes travel onward encountering new friends and foes alike, they learn many things about battling and grow ever stronger! Each time they meet a new companion, they are thrilled to log their new discoveries for future research. With the help of their trusty tools, our heroes are always able to navigate their way through the perils of the path ahead. Geared up in new accessories, our team is blazing the trail to victory!


I sense a thrilling journey ahead! Oh I wish I could go too. Then again, I don't suppose the wilderness has a place to recharge my smartphone. Well then, stop by again next week for another lesson, my delightful Sciencers! Be sure to snag these exciting new experiments from my friends at La Victoire.

Check It Out!

18 Evolving Item Report:Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report:Fireheart Red & [Animal] Fireheart Red! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Sep 18, 2015 8:34 pm

Why hello there, Sciencers! I have made a startling discovery in my latest experiments. I think it might be best if you sit down to observe this breakthrough in EI science. Let's observe!

-


Fireheart Red 2nd Gen. & [Animal] Fireheart Red 2nd Gen.

It's time to meet the famed Champion, Onyx, a powerhouse of a trainer who has waited for you patiently at the summit of a lonely, dangerous mountain. He is ready to challenge the one who proved themselves worthy. Are you ready for the battle?

As the battle wages on, you activate the bracelet given to you. Thanks to the power extended through the bond between you and your companion a new evolution appears!



Wow! What an exciting conclusion. That wasn't what I was certainly expecting, but in the world of science you need to expect for surprises. Well, that's all the small chitchat I can do for now. There is more sciencing that must be done! See you soon, Sciencers!

Visit La Victoire!

25 EI Report: Cold Case Modus Operandi!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: Cold Case Modus Operandi! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Sep 25, 2015 9:00 pm

Hello there, all my favorite science fans! I have a slightly abnormal development to share with you. Rather than revealing just a single evolution of my latest evolving masterpiece, I've whipped out the whole thing! To be quite honest, some interns dropped my trusty old Modus Operandi in some ink and... well, science is science. Take a look!

-


This extra wonderful recolored version of my beloved Modus Operandi weaves exactly the same story as its predecessor. Although it won't be continuing to evolve next week, let's fondly recall the nostalgic beginning of this wonderful tale:


Cold Case Modus Operandi takes place in a faraway kingdom where a third princess has just been murdered. The local police working the case-- Officers Straw, Sticks, and Bricks-- are baffled. Serial homicide, in their little kingdom? They decide to call in help in the form of Detective Wolfe, an expert criminal profiler with an enormous file of known felons, and as the cops soon discover, an abnormally bad attitude.

Upon examining the scene and photos of the previous murders, Wolfe quickly discovers the connecting link: a scrawled "happily ever after" in the princess' blood. A clue to the motive, or the signature of a dangerous serial killer? Peculiar, the officers think, that no one saw these notes until Wolfe arrived on the scene. Meanwhile, Wolfe's presence in the kingdom attracts attention. Some local reporters take interest in documenting Wolfe's progress on the murders, promising to make the investigation even more difficult for the officers.

As Wolfe continues his investigation on the field, the police return to their station and begin to sort through Wolfe's index of killers, finding each one more horrifying than the last...


Ah, memories. If you'd like to get your hands on this wonderful reimagined find, simply visit my friends at La Victoire! And if you're craving the traditional sciencey goodness of a new evolving item, our next adventure is just a week away! (Not to worry, the next evolving item is scheduled to change weekly as per the norm.)


Visit La Victoire!

October Edit

02 Evolving Item Report: Introducing Pumpkin Pupil!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Introducing Pumpkin Pupil! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Oct 02, 2015 7:09 pm

Hello sciencers! Did you know that many of the greatest minds in science were notoriously poor students? Notable examples include Einstein, Mendel, the person who figured out how to make stuffed crust pizza, and even myself! I understand that it may come as a shock, but I wasn't the attentive teacher's pet and star pupil you may imagine me as. After the street brawls and backyard sciencing led to my fair share of disciplinary trouble, I was actually sent to a sort of reform school. My pesky brother Prakash was there too, so at least I had some company. Ah, family tradition I suppose... My point is this: stay in school. Stay in school or you'll end up locked in a room with a guy who takes his notes in crayon and smells like moldy bubblegum wrappers. On a related note, I have a perplexing new Evolving Item to debut. Do take notes!

-


Pumpkin Pupil:

[[ Dear Deathjournal,

I can't believe school starts tomorrow! I've heard many scary things about going to school, but I don't really have any high expectations: maybe just to make some new friends, pass all the school exams with flying colours, and of course, to create mind slaves out of the Human and Halloween worlds with my army of Pumpkin Spice. Um, I should clarify - Pumpkin Spice is the name of my cat. Or multiple cats. My twin stupidly named them all Pumpkin Spice so now we can't figure out which one is the original, and not cloned. He also keeps on telling me the professors at Amityville Academy eat their students if they fail their exam - I really, really hope that's not true, I mean I know I drink a lot of pumpkin spice (the flavor, not the cats) but I promise I don't taste that great!

Anyway, it is getting light outside, I should probably sleep. Will post more tomorrow!

Last posted by PumpkinSpiceisLife at 6:66 am. ]]


Be sure to check in at the same time next week for another astounding update from Amityville Academy. Oh, I do hope that darling Pumpkin Pupil has the nerve and wit to survive school! I'll be eagerly awaiting our next meeting. Until then, scienteers!

Visit La Victoire!

09 Evolving Item Report: Pumpkin Pupil!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Pumpkin Pupil! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Oct 09, 2015 7:05 pm

Hello Scienteers! I assume you're having a productive day full of experimentation? I'd just like to go on the record and suggest that "mad science" is a bit of a harsh term. We in the scientific community like to think of it as "misunderstood science!" On that note, allow me to display a completely unrelated result of some of my very ethical experimentation:

-


Pumpkin Pupil:

[[ Dear Deathjournal:

Wait - why are we keeping an interweb blog about this? It’s the first day of school, not our crowning into town hall mayorship. Hopefully my sister's enthusiasm will wear off, I’m already tired from the first day at school. Who thought there would be so much to learn just about being scary? She's trying on her new dress, so I snuck here to see what she was going to post. SO BORING. Let me just put Pumpkin Spice (number six) on this keyboard instead so they can make more meaningful content that would actually get upvotes.

3dsafoiuroiooooo;;;;;k

That about sums it up. Anyway, the real conversation topic should about how nobody at school noticed this cool Jacked Jacket I was wearing. I'm going to wear this for the rest of October, which is the rest of the year, until someone actually notices!

Last posted by xx_JackFanboy_xx at 4:44 am. ]]

Check out La Victoire to get your hands on this amazing new development. Do be careful though; it hasn't yet been fully tested to meet safety requirements and appropriate levels of radioactivity.


Visit La Victoire!

16 Evolving Item Report: Pumpkin Pupil!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Pumpkin Pupil! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Oct 16, 2015 7:47 pm

Sssh! Quiet down, Sciencers! I'm glad you're here, but please just take a seat. My latest experiment is just about to spring forth with a new development and I made a gigantic tub of buttery popcorn for the occasion. Grab a handful and a notebook. Let's observe!


-


Pumpkin Pupil:

[[ Dear Deathjournal:

I’m still trying to forget the whole fiasco with my brother yesterday. He vandalized the school gym walls glow-in-the-dark spraypaint. I know he has a huge fanboy obsession with the great pumpking overlord Jack but that is taking it a little too far! I overheard him practicing his evil Jack laughter afterwards in detention, I feel sorry for anyone trapped in there with him.

I hate to say it, but without him causing trouble in the house, it was super peaceful and quiet. I mean, sure he didn't come home all night, but they did tell me detention was going to be forever. Maybe if I'm lucky, by the time I graduate he will have learned his lesson. Well, here goes a great new day for me, wish me good luck!

Edit: Okay nevermind I came back and I have to pick up another pair of stockings. Why is it so chilly outside!

Edit 2: Who put the one of the cats outside! It’s frozen solid!

Last edited by PumpkinSpiceisLife at 13:13 am. ]]


Eek, it was just as thrilling as I anticipated! I'll of course have to add all these changes to my research notes, but for now let's just bask in the glow of an evolution well-executed. My compliments to the EI Lab technicians for their hard work and masterful technique. Of course, no team is complete without an awe-inspiring and supremely motivational leader, right? Now if you could pass me that beaker; it's full of genetically manipulated butter by-product. Not only does it make your popcorn taste fabulous, but it also glows in the dark. Thank you! Be sure to visit La Victoire to get your hands on my latest Evolving masterpiece, my delightful Scienteers.


Check It Out!

23 Evolving Item Report: Pumpkin Pupil!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Pumpkin Pupil! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Oct 23, 2015 7:29 pm

Greetings Sciencers! Why, back when I was in school, I had tons of great nicknames. Well, not great so much as descriptive. What I'm saying is that people called me names. Yes, childhood can be cruel and desolate! No one wants to hang out with "Test Tube", "Notepad", or "Drippy"... yeesh. But erm, that wasn't truly the point I was here to make! I wanted to tell you that school is wonderful! So much fun and learning. Why, even the darling Pumpkin Pupil is having a wonderful time at school, and I bet there are tons of kids who can think up great insults for her if truly inspired to do so. Let's observe:

-


Pumpkin Pupil:

Here's a quick blurb too, courtesy of (the fictional cat)!

[[ Dear Deathjournal:

llllllllllloooooooooooppp..........;;;;;;ll

loooooooopopoooi iiiiiippppppp

';;;;;po pppp;p'p ppppp

Last posted by xx_JackFanboy_xx at 1:23 am ]]

。(=ↀωↀ=)。


Yet another fabulous update to the tail, er, tale. So cryptic, but yet so clear. How ever will this scientific oddity continue to amaze us next week? Well Scienteers, you'll simply have to tune in on Friday to find out! In the mean time, check out La Victoire to get your hands on this stunning experiment. Stay safe!


Visit La Victoire!

30 Evolving Item Report: Pumpkin Pupil!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Pumpkin Pupil! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Oct 30, 2015 7:50 pm

Greetings, Sciencers! Why, it seems I have a bit of a sore throat. One could argue that it's the result of my incessant rambling on and on about my varied and many scientific exploits and achievements, sure, but maybe it's just the common cold? I wish I could sort this out myself, but I'm not a doctor. Well I am-- of course. but my PhD degrees are in fields like anthropology, evolving item-ology, chemistry, and karaoke. My alma mater was rather progressive, you see. Well, at least I'm fully qualified to announce that some stunning new developments have taken place in the EI Labs! Let's observe the latest evolution of our fascinating new finds:

-


Pumpkin Pupil:

[[ Dear Deathjournal:

Honestly, that could have gone worse. I thought my brother had escaped to the Smashed Pumpkins Concert the town over, so I just let him be for about a day or two. Or maybe a week, I lost count. Look, between him and homework, only one of the two options will lead me to a bright future as a prospective spook! Anyway, he was finally delivered home today and kept on babbling something about shaving his head and making bloodroot beer in the toilet or something I'm not even too sure what he's going on about. He left his computer on the entire time he was gone, it looks like our cats have found a new permanent bed...

Tomorrow is the big day! It's the day where all residents of Halloween Town go out and scare any Humans hiding in their houses. They say that it is the fear from Humans that created our town! Of course, we don't harm anyone in the scaring, that's why everyone wears masks and costumes to disguise ourselves and mingle with the Humans, though in the case of my brother, it's better for him to mingle with the small Human children. Oh, did I say with, I meant as.

I bought some (completely fake, harmless, non-violent) pumpkins to light up our dreary house, and I heard that Humans really like candy, so I've glued candy to every piece of my costume. All my friends from Amityville are coming too, apparently there is a rumour that a very special guest is visiting our school next week, but for now, one step at a time. Here's to hoping my brother will be on his best behaviour, I even took the time to pick out his costume, which I personally think was better than his "invisible bedsheet ghost" costume.

Happy Spooktactular Halloween to all!

[[Last posted by PumpkinSpiceisLife at 10:05 am ]]


Some exciting changes to a charming item! I simply can't wait to read the rest of this gripping tale. If you'll excuse me, I'm feeling rather croaky. Either the effects of the amphibian-based experimental genetic manipulation we've been practicing on the inter-- willing test subjects have created some sort of airborne illness, or I need a nice honey lozenge and an afternoon nap. Until next week, Scienteers. See you soon!


Visit La Victoire!

November Edit

06 EI Report: The Finale of Pumpkin Pupil!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: The Finale of Pumpkin Pupil! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Nov 06, 2015 6:52 pm

Ah, hello again my delightfully inquisitive Sciencers! Did you know that the common nightmare trope of going to school in your underpants is actually a completely valid phobia? I have a great story about that exact thing happening to my pesky brother Prakash, but I have a feeling that if I tell it, he'll sic some of those terrifying Halloween Kin on me. I'm sure you can piece together the details though: Long night, video games, missed the alarm, we lived close to school, a horde of new nicknames... Ah, good times. Being the sister of No Pants Prakash wasn't the best part of my schooling, but it was much better than being known for my own horrendous screw ups! But before I wax nostalgic to a fault, let's check on the final developments of the amazing Pumpkin Pupil:

-


Pumpkin Pupil:

[[ Dear Deathjournal:

Today started off as any normal week really. I had just finished a class on Human Studies, and was going to pick up my missing jacket from school office when I saw that THE GREAT PUMPKING JACK WAS THERE! He looked right at me, or the wall next to me, which is essentially sort of me anyway by extension of me standing next to it. I may or may not have passed out due to extreme manliness on my part of course.

I asked later when I was um, less extremely manly, and apparently he was visiting the third year students and teaching them the basic applications of Fear. I'm determined now to work harder than ever; by tomorrow I will have graduated from school as top school scary graduate scary student of scariness. After that, everyone will have to bow down to me, the second scariest EVER (after Jack of course) and then after that, I'LL be the one giving students detention.

We had Spooky Faces 101 in class today and the professor told me I passed, which means I ACED IT. My sister may think she's the smart one but I'm the true genius here. No more phones, no more Deathjournal, Grumblr, or Critter on the interwebs, I'm going to study so hard, they'll frame my face in the Amityville Academy school halls at least a thousand times. Wish me good luck - next time you see me I'll be the shadow that lurks behind you, harvesting YOUR Fear!

Last archived by xx_JackFanboy_xx at 6:66 am ]]


A thrilling conclusion to an astounding experiement! Bravo! Cheers! Encore! If only this wonderful science could never end! But alas, this marks the final update to the incredible Pumpkin Pupil. To get your hands on the most recent incarnation of our stunning discovery, simply visit my friends at La Victoire. See you next week, Scienteers!

Visit La Victoire!

13 Evolving Item Report: Cutey Hunter!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Cutey Hunter! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Nov 13, 2015 3:41 pm

Greetings fellow scientists! A life lesson that I want to share with you all today is the value of research. It is so tremendously important to research everything you see and do, so that you can really, truly know what it is you're experiencing! The best scientists are all people who research meticulously. Some people will tell you not to take things too far, but I don't think it is possible for you to over-research. For example, when I was in school I was so intrigued by students sticking gum on the underside of their desks that I did a school-wide evaluation of the phenomenon. I spent the greater part of a week tracking how many pieces of gum were stuck to each individual desk before teachers told me to stop, but I got the results I wanted in the name of science!

Speaking of tracking, you should track this brand new Evolving Item as it progresses:

-


Cutey Hunter:

I'm on the hunt for a cute guy! All of them, actually. I want them all to myself. Every. Single. One. But in order to do that, I have to start with one, so here we are! I haven't gotten a boyfriend through regular routes—you know, waiting for a guy and all that—so I'm taking matters into my own hands, even if getting them to cooperate requires some...friendly persuasion. If guys can get away with playing the field and flirting with a bunch of girls at once, then I can do the same and catch lots of guys, so that's exactly what I'm gonna do. I just need to capture 'em all. Ready or not, guys, here I come!


Check back in next week as we follow our fledgling hunter to see what trouble she gets herself into, and in the meanwhile be sure to do your research, like I said! I look forward to hearing the results of your findings. See you soon, scientists!


Get Cutey Hunter!

20 Evolving Item Report: Cutey Hunter!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Cutey Hunter! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Oct 23, 2015 7:09 pm

Welcome back, fellow Sciencers! I hope you did your research like I recommended last week. Proper research leads to more efficient experimentation, after all! I've been doing a lot of research on experiments myself, though I think my results after experimenting with this most recent EI may have impacted its outcome. That is to say, of course, that they were wholly safe experiments that you shouldn't be worried about in the slightest. Nonetheless, here are my findings for this week:

-


Cutey Hunter:

"HEART SEEKER LAUNCHER? CHECK. KAWAII OUTFIT? CHECK. RUNNING BOOTS? CHECK. BBL OFF TO STEAL YOUR MAN. BYyyyyyeeee"

Our fearless heroine is off and moving, ready to take on any and every guy she can and bring them along with her as her walking trophy case. It sounds like she's fully prepared to hunt her prey down no matter how far he may run, which could spell serious trouble for any guy she runs into. How many guys will be hunted down before she's done?

"I told you already. All of them. Every. Single. One. And the not so single ones, too. Heh. ;3 OK BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEE~"


Some pretty fascinating findings, don't you think? Looks like our fledgling hunter is about to get herself into something serious, so be sure to take notes so you can compile your research later! Check back in next week, I'll have another update for you then. See you soon, scientists!


Get Cutey Hunter!

27 Evolving Item Report: Cutey Hunter!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Cutey Hunter! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Nov 27, 2015 7:07 pm

Welcome back, Sciencers! I hear it's a day for people to be out and about spending time having fun, but there's no time for that when you've got research notes to compile, and it would be a mistake for me to miss out on a chance to maintain my rank as one of the great scientists! Speaking of that, you're just in time for sone fascinating news regarding our most recent EI! As it turns out, our fearless heroine has made some progress. Have a look:

-


"Heeeeeeeeeeyyyyy~ Check out my new boyfriend~! Well, first boyfriend, anyway. There are gonna be more soon, obviously, but this first one was a super easy catch for a master hunter like me. ;3 He got cocky and thought he could just walk away from me, but he was no match for my heart-seeking launcher. You might have heard of him before, actually! He's the local troublemaker. Only now he's my troublemaker. And if anyone gets in my way, he's gonna make trouble for them. You see why I went after him first~ ❤ So now that I've got him on my side, it's time to change up the outfit and hunt down the next one! Get ready boys, I'm coming to get you!"



Our intrepid hunter's progress this week is...notable, isn't it? Hopefully she doesn't get too carried away from here, but if my scientific deductions are accurate, and they always are, we're in for quite the ride! Be sure to check back in next week to see what sort of trouble she manages to get herself into from here. See you soon, scientists!


Get Cutey Hunter!

DecemberEdit

04 Evolving Item Report: Cutey Hunter!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Cutey Hunter! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Dec 04, 2015 6:51 pm

Hello Scienteers! I assume you're having a productive day full of experimentation? I'd just like to go on the record and suggest that "mad science" is a bit of a harsh term. We in the scientific community like to think of it as "misunderstood science!" On that note, allow me to display a completely unrelated result of some of my very ethical experimentation:

-


Cutey Hunter: "Welcome baaaack~! Did you guys think I was done wrangling up all the cuties in town? Did ya? Well, that's where you're dead wrong. I was just uppin' my arsenal. >;3 Y'know they say the quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach. I kinda thought a super splody bomb would be faster, but I gotta do this the right way if I'm gonna nab each and every boy for myself! That's why I whipped up a tasty new treat: The Bon-Bomb! Eat it up and KABOOM!!! You're mine! It sure worked on this clumsy cutie, tee hee! ❤ ❤ ❤ NOW WHO'S NEXT?!"


Our heroine is certainly making progress in her quest. I'm not entirely sure whether to cheer or cringe, if we're being completely factual about my reaction to this development. That said, the progress of Science is always a miracle in action! (Ah, I do mean figuratively as miracles are very hard to quantify of course.) While you're tuning in to see the latest adventures of the vivacious and ferocious Cutey Hunter, be sure to check out La Victoire to score your own fabulously fashionable copy today! Until next week, keep sciencing, my delightful Sciencers!


Visit La Victoire!

11 Evolving Item Report: Cutey Hunter!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement Evolving Item Report: Cutey Hunter! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Fri Dec 11, 2015 1:59 pm

Hello Sciencers! It's been a very busy week for me, with a multitude of projects that required extensive research and analysis. Of course, the important part of any research project like this is to have a control group where changes aren't made, but...there wasn't time for me to measure all of those. Nonetheless, I can reassure you that all of my research projects are done totally ethically and with proper care and procedure, like this one for example:

-


Cutey Hunter:

"Guess who's baaaaaaack~? That's right, it's me, and I've got even MORE new toys to bring in the boys! This new one's my favorite! It's a pretty rose scythe to cut down even the most stubborn guy and make him mine, and boy does it work. I was out on the prowl and found this shy boy who wouldn't say a word to me. He was cute, though, and you know what I do with cute boys~~ ~~ He tried to make a run for it, but I'm on the cutting edge. GET IT?! I used my scythe and totally stopped him dead in his tracks, and now he's all mine~ >;3 I'm not done though! I won't stop until my collection is compleeeeeeeete~ HERE I COME, BOYS!"


Well, our intrepid hunter is definitely accomplishing what she set out to do, although I will be objective in saying that I don't know whether the results of this experiment are to be desired or not. I must get back to my research and recording data here, but in the meanwhile I've left this updated experiment in the capable hands of Jet and Cygnus. You can get your own copy in La Victoire! I'll see you next week, Scienteers! Keep sciencing!


Nab Cutey Hunter!

19 EI Report: The Finale of Cutey Hunter!Edit

  • Icon announceAnnouncement EI Report: The Finale of Cutey Hunter! - [NPC] Dr. Singh Sat Dec 19, 2015 2:00 pm

Hello Scienteers! I hope that with the end of the year approaching you're wrapping up some of your very official studies! If you aren't, then I hope for your sake it is an extended study that goes beyond the span of one year, as otherwise I worry for all of the work you'll have to do in the next few days. Of course, hard work is important, even if it's last-minute hard work! That is how many of the most famous minds in history made their way into the world—and it is of course how I finish working on many of my projects as well. Speaking of, I have the final report to give to all of you regarding our most recent experiment, which was undertaken completely ethically and without breaking any laws whatsoever.

-


Cutey Hunter:

"Heeeeeeeeeyyyyyyy~ Guess what?! I went all out today, my eyes were on the prize, and I BAGGED MYSELF A PRINCE! Wait, lemme back up and start earlier than that. Ya know, I wanted to catch every cute guy in the world (and I still plan to do that, don't get me wrong), but I thought to myself, 'what can you do to make this easier on yourself?' So I got to thinking. And then I got to planning. And theeeeen I got myself an arsenal. You know what they say, bring out the big guns, right?! So I did. >;3 But I was smart about this one, y'know. By going after the prince (who's the GUY OF MY DREAMS, btw), I've now got access to lots of money and supplies to make even better cute-guy-catching equipment. So, when I decide to get back to my hunting, I will definitely enjoy that. But, for now, being a princess will just have to do, what a shame~ ~ ~ ~ ~"


What a tremendous end to a whirlwind of a tale, no? I have to admit, I was worried for our heroine for a while there. Or at least, I was worried for the safety of the people around her. Nonetheless, this experiment has reached its conclusion, and now it's time to gather our research notes and study the results of our findings! You can find a more recent version of this experiment at La Victoire, which I've left in the capable and totally licensed hands of Jet and Cygnus. See you again soon, Sciencers!


Visit La Victoire!

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